Shelby P. (Porn has made her feel insecure & caused mistrust & difficulties with her boyfriend) (15, female, student, Canada, YouTube, emolover118able) (Feb. 2, 2012)
How Pornography Is Affecting Me and My Relationship
I may be only 15 but the porn industry has a major effect on me. I have talked a LOT with my boyfriend about porn, and how it makes me feel, and he hasnt watched it since we started dating. But just the thought of him watching OTHER women having SEX with men disgusts me. It makes me feel insecure about myself.
I am his first time experiencing sex and he told me after actually experiencing making love that porn is just disgusting, and it really grosses him out knowing that they are acting.
I always seem to start a fight with him about what he used to watch and how it makes me feel. This hurts his feelings, but I CAN'T control it. Whenever the slightest thing that reminds me of porn comes up I automatically think of him watching porn, and I start to cry because I feel as though I don't match up to the "sexy" women that he has seen, or I'm not making the right noises or positions.
My feelings get really hurt by it and I don't know what to do. I have tried forgetting and forgiving. I have forgiven him, but the emotional effect porn has on my mind I can't forget. I have been battling an eating disorder because I feel as though i don't look "sexy" or "hot" enough. I have physically harmed myself because of how frustrated I have gotten knowing that MY boyfriend has just seen people having sex.
I believe that the human body should be shared with the person you love, NOT the ENTIRE world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Danielle (Broke up with porn-using dishonest ex-boyfriend & found great new porn-free boyfriend) (female, 18, New Zealand, YouTube) (Jan. 15, 2012)
I am writing this to tell you that pornography is not okay. That it is cheating, and that to support it is to support prostitution with a camera. If you are with someone who uses pornography, do not simply accept this usage as a fact of life; you deserve better than that.
During my teenage years, my first boyfriend used pornography. He lied about using it for a long time, but most people can tell when they're being lied to. I know I could.
I became attached to him, before I knew about the porn, because I was in a bad emotional state when I met him. Only years into the relationship did I find the strength to face that he was lying to me, that he was using pornography. I confronted him about it, and he was extremely reluctant to admit the truth. Once he admitted it, he told me he wouldn’t promise to stop, and he would not admit he was addicted to it. He tried to act like I was being unreasonable. He told me all guys watched pornography. I still broke up with him.
“All guys use porn” was repeated to me by practically all of my friends whom I confided in. Most girls, even though they had a natural repulsion towards their boyfriends watching pornography, simply accepted their boyfriends’ use of it. A good friend of mine told me her own boyfriend explained it to her and that he “wasn’t attracted to them”. Why doesn’t he get off reading Shark Attacks of the Twentieth Century then? It’s sad the lies some of us can believe.
Today, it has been years since I ditched my porn using ex, and my future is much brighter. My current boyfriend is the smartest person I know. It has taken me time to finally trust that he is not going to do what my ex did, because my ex tried to convince me it was so normal. My boyfriend doesn’t use pornography, because he is intelligent and fantastic. He thinks it is disgusting, that it is prostitution, and labels it as cheating. I know him better than anyone does, so I know better than anyone that he’s not lying to me.
I don’t like it when people say that men are just lying when they say they don’t use porn, because it makes the truth hard to see for those who are going through what I went through. It is not difficult to find a man who is not perverted; it may take time to find one who is intelligent enough to appreciate the value of love, but they are out there and I’m sure there are lots of them. Perhaps perverted men just want to paint a picture so that women think they cannot get better than them. Looking back on it, I believe that men who use pornography whilst in a relationship are pathetic and undeserving of love.
Now that I am with someone who does not use it, pornography still bothers me. It bothers me because it is unethical; it is cowardly because there is no cause and effect. Men who would feel perverted and disgusting if they were to go to a brothel feel fine with their pornography habits, even though it is still contributing to the demand for prostitution; because pornography is prostitution, with a camera. It does not matter how much you pay for it, if you are contributing towards the demand, you are a supporter and you are part of the problem.
I do not believe in turning sex into a commodity, as the sex industry does, however, if there are people who will use it as a commodity, it is slightly better for those who are exploiting others to be doing it in a way in which they take responsibility for what their own actions are causing, such as if they were to go to brothels, strip clubs, or live sex shows, which would in many cases have better protection from abuse for their workers.
It is bothersome that pornography is clearly a form of cheating on one’s partner. These women in pornography are real women. It is a double standard to say it is cheating to masturbate over someone other than your partner on webcam, and then to say pornography is okay, when it’s masturbating to real people. Those who say that all men do it, and to “get over it” are ridiculous. If we simply accept behaviour that we do not enjoy, it reinforces it as a social norm and people will continue to believe it is okay to act that way.
If your partner is using porn and it is bothering you, do not accept it. Even if only a microscopic percentage of the male population doesn’t watch porn, it’s still millions of men. And surely there are also more of them who are smart enough to quit once they have a think about it, because they would understand why it was wrong. You won’t die a lonely spinster, and you won't have regrets if you do what you know is right. Be strong, and remember to stand to your convictions.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kimi Gee (Ex-underage porn performer with her porn illegally still on the Internet) (female, 42, U.S.) (Dec. 26, 2011)
It's not my fault I was in porn, it started when I was underaged, just like Traci Lords, but without fake IDs. I was lured by a porn retail predator, and not willingly in the first place.
The porn industry tries to glamorize itself on mainstream TV that it is good for relationships. Maybe it is, on the front-end, about 5%, the other 95% of the hundreds of billions of dollars is made off of smut --slice-and-dice re-releases derived from original films, then recreated into the worse possible productions imaginable. The smut that's out there does not promote love and lust in relationships... it promotes sickening disgustment, not a turn-on at all, almost numbing.
Wake up America. What Playboy, Hustler, Excalibur, AEBN, Sin City, Pleasure, VOD.com, and other adult porn industries really makes its millions off of is smut and child porn! You know, Vivid tried to sue AEBN for this crap and Pleasure tried to sue the satellite cable company of New Frontier Media that runs Ten channel, but when billions are flocking in by consumers... not even the production companies have the power to regulate this multitude of smut, nor the funds to go up against the billions made off this type of GREED, while the performers who had been mass exploited got how much for the smut...? NOTHING, NOT A PENNY!
And to you production companies I worked for in a few films in 1997: Warning: all your films with Kimi Ji footage have been sliced-and-diced by other porn companies, especially those with a reputation of taking other company's footage and re-hashing it. Yeah, it's your footage, I left the industry then and have not made any films in 14 years.
Also, if Caballero passed away and the contact address for him and production companies I never worked for are all located at the same contact address... yet, they are using footage mainly from films of another production company from 1997 that shut down, and therefore is no longer business licensed to have resold the footage... HOW COME THE FOOTAGE IS BEING PIRATED!! PIRATED!!!! Do ya'll even care? 100 smut films that shouldn't be out on the market, and those actually are some of the worst of the slice-and-diced, and should be confiscated and removed, to say the least.
These going-ons compare to the treatment of slave laborers during the slave trade era, but at least the slaves got a roof over their heads and food on the table for their labors -- at least they got something for their efforts, not just sheer misery.
Let me give you an example: the contact for Excalibur and its domains is a ficticious name, so who then are you guys giving your credit card info to? It could even be funding terrorism, for all you know. And the fan pages do not email to me, it's a SCAM and emails the website instead.
Also, it is sickening how Hustler's owner can brag that he can pay some jailbird $500,000 to do porn, yet he hasn't paid one penny for hundreds of performers for thousands of bootleg films being sold on his website, not even for promotional bios, while selling child porn on his site.
I would love to point out to Playboy and Hustler where child porn is on their sites for sale!! Isn't the sale of child porn illegal? It is available for sale on most of the millions of adult websites online, and no one at the government level has come down on these websites and adult companies for it, only on every other issue except this one, WHICH IS THE MAIN ISSUE! If I were the government I would have put a stop to it in the first place, the smut films with no scripts nor value, and confiscated all funds made from it.
The bootleg smut that has been coming out is not good for relationships. For example, a performer gets a script with lines to memorize, has a scene, thinking she picked a particular part to only perform certain tasks, and therefore there were choices, plus pay. The bootleg slice-and-dice films, half of which are automatically recreated by one of the porn retailers based on search terms... are heartless, being it is all mostly recreated by a computer machine mechanically.
Why am I in smut with transvestites (no offense, but I'm female), horse and animal porn, and films where certain performers have passed away due to Aids/HIV or are infected...? When none of that was how the original films were made? Those were sliced into those type of films using special effects, mechanically and heartlessly. Very inhumane! And you lawyers say that could not affect me, my careers, and life, and could only be compensated by proving loss of my current income? Shouldn't I be compensated for reputable damages? Come on America, it's ridiculous and no one should have to be treated that way. It is horrible!
Besides, pornography causes people to be distracted from reality, causes violent behavior, causes men to treat women poorly or in an obnoxious manner, to disrespect their fellow comrades, and ruins the lives of the performers, especially those who are NOT doing porn.
Some performers only entered porn for a year and only did maybe 30 films, some only one and realized it was a mistake. That does not mean that person deserves to be splattered and exploited across millions of pages online, no one deserves that type of treatment. Every human being has a right to make mistakes, but also has a right to move on and do other things, go back to school, get a normal job.
Smut is like slave labor, because in the past, if a performer was going through hard times, did a few films, and didn't get paid much, a VHS tape would be on and off the shelves for a short time that it was around. Now streaming footage is exploited online over a million pages for all the world to see, without performer pay or permission. Are slave labor contracts not illegal in America, and therefore void? Are there not laws to protect people's choices to agree or not to agree, and if you're not being paid for performances, isn't it therefore slave labor, especially if you would have never agreed to the manner in which the films coming out are presented?
Why America, why allow it to occur? Or are you just not aware what's been going on? Those films were slice-and-diced into 400 or so unpaid rereleases per performer over a period of 14 years that the internet has been around -- with current production dates, misleading consumers as to when the footage was made, (by not listing those films as compilations with true production dates or use of rerelease dates), and by presenting the films as new films while putting performers on box covers without box cover pay nor agent fees. Even worse -- it's not how the footage was made, but what's presented is a knock-off bootleg version of the worse smut imaginable, no scripting, no value, just smut.
Where are the laws, America? Why doesn't anyone stand up and say "it's wrong," "it's inhumane!"? There are laws, but everyone turns a blind eye, and why... because if laptops and technology are to be sold, being porn is the main search of men -- why do they allow it to happen and remain in their search engines, while locating their main facilities abroad to avoid US taxes, so they can make more sales and be invisible behind ficticious names that are virtually immune to US regulations? Just another form of GREED? Whose campaign funds are funded by it if anyone can donate online? Let's hope whoever America picks for their next candidate, will be willing to see that it is wrong, what's been going on.
It doesn't help that mainstream networks glamorize the unregulated internet, while not realizing the damages caused by it, that it's not cool to be unregulated, instead it's very damaging to many individuals. Caring starts at the bottom of the chain, and when something this horrible is allowed, the effects trickle up to every level in one form or another, and by then, it's a mess.
I'm so sick of hearing, "that's Kimi Gee," and other very annoying comments, when I haven't even been doing porn the past 14 years, and it's only because of the 400 smut streaming footage splattered online that I did not do.
It's disgusting that the government did not put a stop to the smut in the first place. If the hundreds of thousands of smut streaming pieces of footage are removed, what is the internet left with? A BETTER QUALITY OF LIFE! Men will still look up porn, but at least they'd be looking up what they're supposed to, not disgusting bootleg remakes that cause violent behavior and the disrespectful treatment of women in an abusive manner.
There's a reason why many countries have simply decided to block porn completely: because most of it is SMUT, and it's very damaging to the economical and psychological state of any nation!! I have one question for America, why allow it to continue that way? It simply isn't right, AND the only way it will change is if it is PUBLIC POLICY. So either the PUBLIC as a whole stands up and says it's WRONG, or this endless torture will NEVER STOP!
If nothing else, America, keep in mind that all the smut online is pointing straight to America... which makes America look bad. Think of that when you're trying to generate funds in an already suffering economy. If you don't care enough to fix the problem, why should funding sources care about you? It's already happened where everyone in public positions would have to wonder if they were even getting another paycheck, if America was on the verge of bankruptcy. Well, if the hundreds of billions of smut was so great to the economy... WHY IS THE ECONOMY SUFFERING ANYHOW? DID YOU REALLY BENEFIT FROM LETTING IT OCCUR?
If you didn't stand up to it and make an effort to put a stop to it, you let it occur! And why should it even be your problem...? The catch 22 of the laws state that it must be "PUBLIC POLICY" in order to enforce change upon the matter of SMUT!
I'm sure all the smut producers, many being foreign and preying off of US-made footage, including the out-sourcing company that bragged how it makes millions while out-sourcing the worse editing of footage to some foreign worker for $5 pay a day to make smut, while no one even considers that the reason no one edits it that way here is because it makes America look bad, of course the performers did not agree to it, it's dated fraudulently, and it's simply wrong... all these producers are sitting back drenched in their billions of dollars laughing at America while the economy suffers, laughing in the darkest gloom of your economical destruction because you all never even bothered to do anything about it.
You can still change what's been going on! The first step is public awareness. I've taken the time to put this out, so you know. I won't tell you what films, because I'm not going to have a bunch of pedophiles using the links to purchase those. Just know: all films dated year 1999 until present date were either derived from child pornography, or derived from films from year 1997, listed mostly by production companies other than those Kimi Gee had worked for, which have been sliced-and-diced in a horribly unbecoming manner that is very damaging.
Please people, how could it NOT be damaging? Really?
Now, please take the time to write your congressmen, consumer affairs divisions, or business licensing organizations to ask why it's allowed. Write the Federal Trade Commission, the FBI, the Labor Department, advocates, and anyone you can think of... to let them know that you don't agree the smut should be there. I've already written to them! Nothing will be done until enough individuals step up and say it's wrong!
Having a contract with a performer to pay a performer for a film, plus extra if they are going on a box cover, plus a separate contract if using a biography to promote A PARTICULAR FILM only, means: The contract is for the original film and compilations from it, promotional material for that film, box cover only if paid for originally, and nothing more -- especially since the performer's agent only got a fee for that scene of that film and no other films.
You want to put out another new release with a new production date of NOW? Be prepared to pay for that film, plus the box cover, plus damages for your lies about when the footage was produced, and for recreating the footage in an unacceptable manner without script in the worse possible manner in all of existence.
Law enforcement could care less, the public could care less. Or maybe you do care. If so, write your politicians and enforcers. The Feds could care less, the US government could care less -- until enough of the public reacts in the matter.
Hundreds of lawyers who have already been faxed could care less unless I stick a huge paycheck in front of them, and it would still not get anywhere... But the porn industry and retailers will HAVE TO PAY FOR LABOR AND DAMAGES... for those 400 films and any others exploited all over the internet on millions of webpages. This unregulated activity of bootleg smut MUST BE PAID FOR!!
The system has failed, but that doesn't mean there is not a solution. Some attorneys say what I'm telling you is unclear, in general, or meaningless, but I doubt those attorneys find smut disturbing and probably get off on it. Wake up, America, tell me, DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING? Am I not typing in English?
If nothing else, since bars and liquor stores have to card people that they are age 21 to buy alcohol, then why do you not push for Federal and State laws that porn retailers and websites cannot publically display nudity and porn until after it is provable that the party is an adult of age 18? Bars and liquor stores don't just ask, are you 21? Any kid or teenager under 18 could say, yeah I'm an adult... and look at all the disgusting smut online. Get a life America, wake up!
I want the child pornography and re-releases derived from it removed from each and every porn site online, enough is enough. Just because Traci Lords is a blonde, doesn't mean I'm not a US citizen since I'm half Asian. I am! I have rights, and it's time for America to let the government know how you feel about it!
I can't do it alone, and it's been an ongoing battle for many, many years. There is always a solution! Stand up to it America, and take back your dignity! And when you vote for your next president, make sure you don't vote for someone who is brain-washed by smut and won't do a darn thing about it. It doesn't benefit society... it destroys it!
Kahshanna Evans (Had her identity as a professional actress stolen & abused by a pornographer. Is seeking help to bring him to justice) (female, Los Angeles, CA) (Dec. 20, 2011)
Hi, my name is Kahshanna Evans. In the year 2006 I caught a man named Jim McBride, owner of Chicago-based popular porn company S K Entertainment and owner of Mr. Skin dot com, (a porno website claiming to show naked celebrities meanwhile using their names to promote his pornography) using my likeness, identity and name on IMDB - a then and still highly respected film industry database I was listed on for the films I have done as a legitimate actress. This site is used by film industry professionals to identify working actors and easily access their resume of achievements. My own achievements listed on my acting resume include work with HBO, the Chris Rock Show, Law & Order: SVU and work with Ben Stiller.
Jim McBride listed his pornography film under my profile claiming I had done a film entitled Black Male and clicking to his site it is insinuated Kahshanna Evans from Riverside, California (there's only one and that's me) has a porno alias, and by clicking links into his website he could show nude photos of me. The clicks lead to a prompt to pay for a membership.
It took seven years to have IMDB remove the false porno film from my profile, meanwhile the database grew in being a reliable source for the film industry. I hired a boutique public relations firm who finally elicited a response from IMDB to remove the pornographic film claiming to be my work. Terms for what he is doing include Cyber Bullying, Identity Theft, Copyright Infringement, Electronic Harassment.
Thanksgiving Friday of 2011 I found Mr. Skin was at it again, this time having taken KahshannaEvans as a user name and linking it to his site claiming if people wanted to see me nude to just click the hyperlink and they'd be able to.
Here is an article that I stumbled on with more about him:
The ripoff report I came across has a response from a lawyer which I called and they suggested I email him at the customer service email.
Mr. Skin's Facebook page that he promotes himself on:
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Mr-Skin/30992850409
I am interested in gaining the support of someone to permanently stop him and send him a message that he can't just go around stealing identities of people to promote his pornography website.
I was positive the email I sent to the customer service would be as highly valued as a snowflake - interestingly enough he was responsive getting a cease and desist letter from Simpson, Thacher and Bartlett, LLP.
I am someone Jim McBride stole identity from and I want him to stop permanently. I contacted Twitter and they had the false profile removed. I thought it was strange with a few very weird followers on Twitter that were very young with user names like 'getsome', etc., but after I found his Twitter in my name that links to the webpage that has been using my name without permission since anywhere between 2000 when the movie came out and 2006 when I actually caught him, it's no wonder some young, horny idiot would mistake the misleading links and information Jim McBride strategically designed and profited from.
I have just started a new job three months ago and am looking to have a quality professional image... not the smut that comes up in Google with the right 'key' words.
Though I am in New York City, I have reported Jim McBride to the Chicago Police, ic3.gov - a website for fraud, the Illinois Attorney General, Twitter and directly his customer service.
I need help and support and I'm angry and frustrated. I have worked really hard for two decades for whatever name or image I have. After loosing a home in California I relocated back to New York this year, so my dreams of a fancy legal flogging are not within my grasp. I just got a job at a small Technology Company and don't want that threatened or my name further damaged and I don't think it's ok for a multi million dollar company to get away with stealing identities like this and to be able to skirt on a cease and desist letter. Please help.
Thank you,
Kahshanna Evans
CONTACT INFO: Please contact me through the contact page at my website kashannaevans.com:
NOTE: My website is a FLASH website and as such cannot be viewed or accessed on Apple computers or Apple mobile devices such as iPads or iPhones, as they do not support Adobe Flash. So if you would like to view my site or use my contact form on my contact page, please use a PC or mobile Android device to do so. Thank you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0262933/
Ma Collection de Alain Afflelou
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
feminismo3x (Pretending to lust after guys in porn made the point with her boyfriend of how she feels when he lusts after other women in porn) (female, 22, U.S.) (Nov. 12, 2011)
DISTURBATION: Instead of explaining to my boyfriend about how I felt about him lusting after other women in porn while being in a relationship with me, like I had tried in the past, I decided to just put him in my position.
As we were laying there in his apartment bedroom, I pretended to masturbate to Thor, the supposedly sexy chiseled godlike actor, and Edward, the supposedly hot dangerous vampire in Twilight, both of whom I don’t even know their real names.
So I moaned ,“Oh Thor.. oh yeah.. Edward.. yes yes yes!” And not to my surprise, my boyfriend, upset and utterly disturbed, turns the other way and says flat out “You’re disgusting.” So I try to comfort him by putting my hand on his shoulder. “Honey, are you OK?” He stays faced away and says in a monotone voice, “Don’t touch me, you gross me out,” and throws my hand off him.
I hold back my giggle, instead, I pretended to give him an angry tone: “Honey, you need to grow up, OK, it’s normal, everyone does it. God, I’m not hurting anyone, I’m just in the moment to get off and then I'll be done. I still love you.” I smiled, and gave him a big hug. He pushes me off again. I can tell he was hurt. “At least I’m not watching Thor or Edward naked with their rock hard abs and hard c*ck, like you do with…” He continues: “I told you I stopped watching porn already, OK?”, and he assured me he was on the same page: “PORN IS WRONG. So.. you were masturbating to both Thor and Edward?.. AT THE SAME TIME??? EWWW! GROSSS!!! GET OFF ME!!”
“NO stupid," I replied, "I wasn’t even thinking about them. I was just trying to prove a point.”
Still disturbed.. he laid there with his arm over his forehead... Grossed out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lance (Heartbroken by what he's seen in extreme pornography while doing research) (male, 26, U.S.) (Aug 11, 2011)
I discovered a website called "Latina Abuse" while I was researching different forms of sexual abuse for a domestic violence clinic. I found out the makers of this website also make websites called "Facial Abuse" and 'Ghetto Gaggers."
I came on this website (AntiPornography.org) and posted how horrified I was on the "Share Anti-Porn Comments" page. The founder of this website was kind enough to reach out to me and encourage me to post on this page. I want to let you all know after viewing these sites, my heart goes out to the women who undergo humiliation for money, the abusive men who destroy these women on screen, and the people who watch this.
These websites feature men slapping women, spitting on women, choking women, brutally forcing women to give them oral sex, and extreme anal and vaginal penetration. The men oftentimes put the women in headlocks and other UFC fighter type chokeholds and the women frequently vomit. The men then proceed to hit them. Oftentimes the women even cry. The men ridicule them more. It is clear their cries are very real, and this isn't part of the "script."
Here is a 10 second example of the kind of violent porn that is making money these days:
WARNING: THIS CLIP IS EXTREMELY DISTURBING HARDCORE PORNOGRAPHY THAT FEATURES A MAN PLACING A YOUNG WOMAN IN A CHOKEHOLD WHILE SHE IS PERFORMING ORAL SEX. HE CHOKES HER UNTIL SHE CRIES. THIS PAIN IS VERY REAL SO DO NOT VIEW THIS UNLESS YOU FEEL YOU CAN REALLY HANDLE IT.
NOTE: To view content at below URL copy and paste it into the address bar of a separate tab or page and then hit ENTER on your keyboard.
http://m.worldstarhiphop.com/video.php?v=wshhPQ987GjfJlGmRV98
At the conclusion of these videos the men ejaculate on the womens' faces, spit on them, and the women usually cry. The men shout racist insults to the women. (I saw a scene with one Latina woman during which they smeared guacamole and vomit on her face)
Further, during the whole ordeal, the men ridicule the woman by asking her insulting questions. If she is Spanish-speaking, they ask her "How do you say 'I'm a whore' in Spanish?" Or they ask questions like, "Ever been abused like this before?"
I did some background research on the founders of these abusive porn websites and they claim that it is all an act, and it is no different than boxing, where adults consent to such activities. But the abuse in these films is very real, and I believe the filmmakers are heavily insulated from contract liability. (They have a team of attorneys working for them). Here is an interview with the maker of those films:
TEXT:
AUDIO: (Note: Interview begins at 30:08)
There was apparently a case where one of the participants named "Ivy", a Ghanaian immigrant who was in one of the Ghetto Gaggers videos, tried to commit suicide after making the film. (Not sure on the details, but read about it.)
Seeing these videos broke my heart because it is clear many of these young women, though they sign a contract, are not ready for the kind of abuse they endure. These videos are widely available on YouTube-type porn sites. Soon this will become the norm and porn watchers will be stimulated by women realistically "tapping out" because of so much fierce intense physical abuse.
Once upon a time peeking at a pair of breasts was enough to stimulate. Now people will become accustomed to watching amateur porn actresses being penetrated anally, orally, and vaginally in the most abusive way possible, short of actually killing them. Surely this can't all be justified under the shield of contract law, no?
I would love for outreach members of AntiPornography.org to find a way to reach out to the women who acted in these videos and ask them-why did they do this video? Did they need the money to feed their kids? Do they truly just enjoy rough sex and the guys who make those videos are masters of editing? When the women cry, is that real?
Again, the websites are: LatinaAbuse.com, GhettoGaggers.com and FacialAbuse.com
I felt so bad while watching those women get degraded, and I just feel it would be hugely beneficial for us to try and communicate with these women who acted in these videos.
My research also led me to a porn actress named Claryn Beau. She was scheduled to do a shoot for "Facial Abuse" and she could not last even 5 minutes. The abuse was so severe, and she had popped some of the veins in her eyes. She detailed this horrific incident in her blog.
WHILE THIS BLOG IS FOR ADULTS, I URGE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU TO READ HER ENTIRE BLOG AS SHE DESCRIBES THE BRUTAL EXPERIENCE OF WORKING ON THE SHOOT OF "FACIAL ABUSE."
What troubles me the most is the makers of those videos are entirely insulated by the contract. Please read her story on the following site:
I also encourage the founder and members of this website to consider exposing these filmmakers' videos as well. One woman already did this regarding "Ghetto Gaggers" with a video she made and posted on YouTube, (which is posted on the " Racism in Pornography" page on this website), but the amount of abuse and money that is being made off this kind of abuse is deeply troubling.
Perhaps we are all fooled. Perhaps the makers of these videos are no different than some of those filmmakers we saw on the "snuff film" documentary, where they managed to do an amazing job of simulating pain and suffering.
But I assure you, the women who are crying, vomiting, and being slapped and humiliated in this video are not acting.
I sincerely wish we can contact the amateur actresses who acted in these LatinaAbuse/FacialAbuse/GhettoGaggers videos.
Also, please read an anti-pornography person's blog entry on the videos of "Ghetto Gaggers" and "Latina Abuse." Please support this blog entry:
I assume nothing can be done, (as the adage goes, if you don't like it, don't watch it), but I just had to share these abusive websites with someone because I have not been able to recover from watching the clips I saw. I'm having trouble going to sleep at night because of what I watched.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jack (Victim of severe childhood sexual abuse, sex trafficking & sexual slavery, including filming of it) (male, 21, Canada, YouTube) (Aug 6, 2011)
I am a survivor of child sexual exploitation. The absolute hell that I went through all those years ago still haunts me to this day, both the memories and the physical, mental and emotional damage that unfortunately will never completely heal. I would not wish what I went through on the Devil himself. I hope some of you find my story to be helpful and if I can reach at least one man, woman or child, then I know sharing my painful past will have been worth it. The following is my story...
Ok, where to start. I was around 5 or 6 years old when the abuse started. It all started when I was at a Youth Group meeting and I had to go to the bathroom. I was walking to the hallway in the corner of the gym where the bathrooms were. I was met in the hallway by the leader of the group. I forget his name but he asked me where I was going and I said I had to go to the bathroom. He said he would "help" me.
I knew how to use the toilet, so I didn't need help, but I allowed him to accompany me. When I was finished he grabbed a kleenex off the counter and was "cleaning" me off. He threw the kleenex in the toilet, but continued to touch me. These trips to the bathroom with him eventually became routine, and I just accepted it as his "help". Then, when I was 6 or 7, I graduated to the next level of the Youth Group. And it is here where the truly sadistic acts of abuse took place.
The first memory I have of being abused in this new Youth Group was when I was taken to the basement of the church. There was a general rule, and that was to never go into the basement. It was "off limits". Anyways, one night the leader of the group said he wanted to talk to me about something, (I forget what exactly) but it was important. He led me out of the gym, and led me down the concrete steps into the basement. We went down the hall, turned a left, and entered the first room on the left.
All the doors were steel, and the walls were made of solid concrete. I remember that there was a small table and chairs on the right wall, and in the far corner, there was a cot, or some type of bed. He didn't turn the lights on because there was a yellow-tinted window above the bed, which let in enough light. He told me to take off my uniform. I did, down to my underwear. And then he told me to take the underwear off too. I remember tears streaming down my face as I did it. Then he said that I was perfect, and started caressing and kissing me.
ANTIPORNOGRAPHY.ORG NOTE: Because this story is extremely long and the rest of it is EXTREMELY GRAPHIC AND DISTURBING, it is continued on its own page at the link below. Just go to that page and SCROLL DOWN TO THE BREAK in the page and continue reading from there.
WARNING: Do NOT read the rest of this story unless you are okay with being exposed to a great deal of profanity (used to recount the language of the abusers) and to VERY graphic and disturbing descriptions of sadistic sex acts being carried out on a child.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kittens-rock (Was exposed to porn her sister was watching) (female, 12, U.S., student, YouTube) (June 4, 2011)
Well, can I just say that I love this website? It's honestly taught me so much that I never knew about porn.
Not saying that I have ever watched porn, but I know that I've caught my sister looking at it and it was girl-guy stuff but it was gross. She was on the computer that everyone can see what she's doing too! I mean, I got a glance since she was taking forever and it was horrible! I told my mom and she told my sister (23) to watch that kind of stuff in her bedroom.
I will never ever do any kind of porn or prostitution in my life after checking this website out.
Melissa (Both her boyfriend & her mother's molester boyfriend used porn & it destroyed their relationships) (female, 35, U.S.) (May 30, 2011)
I grew up with a grandpa that was a pastor. My Mom however was a wild child, and married a man that was into pornography. I remember feeling very uncomfortable around her husband when I was little, and I tried to tell my Mom how I was feeling but it backfired on me. A few years later her husband molested my little sister that was about two years old at that time, and this was his biological daughter. So my instincts even at such a young age were correct.
Our lives changed dramatically after that. Child Protective Services got involved, and they were threatening to take my little sister away from my Mom, so we moved to a state far away and changed our names. This was when my Mom legally separated from my sister’s dad. All this happened within a month or two.
My Mom was very confused as to whether my sister had truly been molested or not. She was in a state of denial, or trying to get there at least. My sister was molested because all the physical signs were present. This man also used to try to watch me while I was showering, and then when I caught him he’d try to pretend like he was just playing a prank on me.
Well several years after the molestation incident, my Mom went back to my sister’s dad. That happened nearly 20 years ago and relations with my Mom have been estranged ever since. My little sister has not spoken to our Mom in years, and she chooses to not let our Mom back into her life. That is absolutely her right to do so. My Mom and my sister’s dad only stayed together for a few years, and then broke up. It did not work out, and my Mom’s decision to go back to him caused a lot of damage in our family.
By this time I was in my early 20's and I had moved to another state to get away from my Mom. My little sister came to live with me because our Mom was back with her father that molested her. Around this time I met a man that I had strong feelings for. We moved too fast and I moved in with him without knowing him very well.
Shortly after moving in with my boyfriend, I discovered that he had been looking up porn on my computer every single morning before he went to work. It wasn’t just regular porn, but more along the lines of gay porn and searches for “pre-teens.” I waited a few months to see if this was a habit of his before confronting him on it. Well it was a habit, and it was an addiction as well. He tried to claim that he thought “pre-teens” meant that they were over 18. He then tried to claim that he thought the men he was looking at were actually women. He lied. I also found a photo picture of a transvestite in the trunk of his car.
The relationship ended and almost cost me my life. A few years into the relationship, I could no longer deal with the anxiety of the situation, and I started to take tranquilizers. I did not realize how addictive these drugs were. Why I didn’t just leave the relationship is because I was young and I was weak, and I loved this man. Fortunately I never had any children with him during the nine years we were together. I contribute that to God’s voice in the back of my head alerting me to the fact that this guy wasn’t father material.
This man never loved me. I almost died when trying to get off the tranquilizer medication I was on, and he emotionally abused me through the whole ordeal. I get online often and read stories about husbands that supported their wife through what I went through with the tranquilizer addiction, and I realize he never truly loved me. There was no love and no emotional support, only abuse. I attribute his lack of empathy and lack of compassion to his porn addiction.
I believe when men repeatedly look at such images, it desensitizes them. We are to respect ourselves and love ourselves enough to not allow such images into our minds, because God never intended for husbands to have such a lustful spirit for other women. And that is what porn does, it creates a lustful spirit. I believe that many men have been brainwashed into believing that lust is love, and this also sends very confusing messages to younger folks. It is very hard these days to find a man that behaves like a gentleman. If you watch classic movies, women behaved like ladies and men behaved like gentleman. It’s a sign that we are moving farther and farther away from God, towards a more loveless world.
Also, the friends I have that are still married have husbands that do not bring porn into their homes. Their marriages have survived and seem to be going strong.
Porn does destroy relationships and destroys marriages. It’s a terrible foundation to lay down, and a very rocky one that most likely will end in heartache and disaster.
I am now 35 and am close to obtaining my Bachelor’s degree in accounting. I am trying to pick up the pieces of my life, and I will never date another man that has issues with porn again. If it should become an issue, I will walk. I plan on finishing my degree in accounting before entering another relationship because I want to have two legs to walk out on if I have to do that.
Also, I have come to view porn addictions as a form of demon possession. That is the only way I can come to grips with it psychologically, because when I think of hell, I think of a bunch of people having sex together. Sins of the father and mother are in fact passed down to children, so yes, it’s all a form of a generational curse. I also think of the devil as being incapable of love with a lustful spirit.
Like I said, everyone I know that seem to have strong marriages do not have porn issues in their marriages. I think that fact speaks volumes.
------------------------
Kat (Harmed by boyfriend's pornography use) (female, 30, U.S., YouTube, frolickunicorn) (Jan. 17, 2011))
After reading a lot on your site, I've come to the conclusion that I already suspected. I think my ex-boyfriend was very into porn, hardcore porn. I can't go as far as to say he was an addict, but I think he watched enough of it that he became jaded in regards to sex. He often wanted to do "facials", to put his hands around my neck, and often, if he was too rough and I would begin crying, he did not stop. I too became jaded into thinking this was ok, that he was just very horny and unable to stop having sex once he started. I thought this was ok and "normal." I know now that it's not.
There were times that if I didn't feel like having sex, he would pretty much talk me into it somehow, or force me sometimes if alcohol was involved. He is a very educated and intelligent person, so I was driven to a state of denial and believed that all of this was ok in a sense even though in the back of my head I knew it wasn't.
I found porn clips on his computer sometimes and I know that he watched it, but I suspect it was more often than I liked to believe. Even his mother said she found some on the family computer once after he'd visited for the holidays. She described it as "bad porn", so I suspect it was violent or degrading. For years our sex life was simply whatever was pleasing to him. I never had an orgasm and it didn't matter to him and honestly, not to me either as I just wanted to get it over with.
After looking on your site, I've realized that, almost without a doubt, porn was influencing this in some ways. It wasn't always this way, but when I began finding things on his computer was around the time this sort of sexual behavior began.
I'd like to thank and support you for educating people on the harms this can cause in many aspects of life, including intimate relationships. I look back and wish I'd been more aware of what was causing him to act this way sexually and why, and that it was not normal in any way. We're no longer together, but now I know I can look for these things in the future.
Liz (Hurt by childhood sexual abuse & infidelity of porn-using ex-boyfriend) (female, 19, New Hampshire, YouTube) (Dec. 9, 2010)
Thank you so much, honestly, for making the videos at your AntiPornographyBlog YouTube channel, for spreading your message, and for waking me up!
Recently I have been dealing with a lot regarding my past. I was sexually abused when I was younger, about 5, by a family friend, and nothing was ever done. I have also been taken advantage of in a relationship where my ex-boyfriend was very into porn. It made me feel like I wasn't good enough, and I also found out that he had been cheating on me for 3 months. (Devastating).
I started to rationalize the degrading behaviors because all I've ever wanted was love, attention, and understanding. I'd do anything for it. It's all been hard to talk about, but your videos have saved one more person from a miserable life of degradation, hurt, pain, sickness, and loneliness.
A friend of mine at YouTube, SoberAllmanBrothersFan, told me about your videos and I watched them. THANK GOD I did. You've opened my eyes to how sick this whole industry is and the abusive people it creates, and the beautiful, intelligent, capable people it destroys.
I want to do anything that I can to stop this. I'm 19 years old and I was considering my options for making money. I never saw "what the big deal was" about pornography, until now. I want to do whatever I can to help other young women like myself, and put a stop to this cancer in our society.
Thank you again,
God Bless, Liz
Regretful (Childhood exposure to porn turned her into a porn user) (female, 23, Blogger) (November 23, 2010)
I'm a 23 year old woman who has been looking at porn for about 5 years now. I've actually known most of these 'truths about the porn industry' all along, (such as the ones addressed in your blog post "Jenna Jameson's 25 Good Reasons Why No One Would Ever Want to Become a Porn Star"), yet continued to use porn anyway. The best way I can explain it is that in the heat of the moment, I sought out porn to aid with masturbation, and temporarily ignored my intellectual disagreement with porn.
I was exposed to porn at the very young age of 12, thanks to a careless family member who stupidly left pornographic files saved onto the family computer, and pornographic magazines and VCDs in unlocked drawers. At that age, I was disgusted by the acts described. Yet, after continued exposure over the years, I became totally desensitised to the rough, filthy and hateful acts portrayed, and lost empathy for the women in the scenes. I found pleasure by relating to the male actors in the scene, as it was obvious to me that the women were just faking enjoyment/ barely concealing immense discomfort.
Right now, I've made up my mind to give up porn for the rest of my life. It's not just because of the harm done to the porn actresses. It's also because of the harm I've done to myself. My lack of empathy makes me feel like I've turned into a monster. I've lost all interest in sex; my head is too filled with images from porn. I can't take part in 'vanilla' sex without being reminded of the despicable things I've watched and feeling turned off by those images. I carry around this feeling of guilt everyday; I've helped destroy some women psychologically, and inadvertently watched actual rapes. Those images will haunt me forever.
I don't know if I can ever heal fully by abstaining totally from porn. I guess I deserve it for the harm I've caused to others. I'm hopeful that maybe in years to come, I can heal somewhat; but I have a feeling I'll be scarred for life.
Gabriel (Unwanted porn exposure as a child, porn harmed his relationships) (male, 21, Sydney, Australia, YouTube) (November 11, 2010)
Porn harms in a big way. This is my story.
I was 13 when I first saw a pornographic movie. The sex was rough and unloving. The guy grabbed the female by the throat and cussed at her as they did their thing. As I watched my insides twisted and churned with emotions I couldn't even process. I was too young and didn't fully understand what I was seeing on the screen, so comprehending that and my emotions at the same time was impossible. As I watched I felt like I left my body and went back in again. I was shocked, emotionally sledgehammered, but paradoxically incredibly turned on by seeing a completely naked female for the first time.
The whole experience burned on my mind like a permanent mental branding. I internalised my confusion. I packed it away to process and look at another time but I couldn't shake those scenes from my mind for days after. The movie fascinated me sexually and from them on I saw a lot of porn.
My real problem was that my dad has never had a job and was always at home. He was really into porn and just used to sit around the house watching porn videos on the TV in our living room during the day while my mom was at work, so my siblings and I didn't have a choice about viewing it because we couldn't help but see it. This was especially true during school vacation times as us kids were home every day.
Later on, as I started my own sexual relationships as a late teen, I found I couldn't connect with my partner emotionally during or after lovemaking. It was like I was an empty shell. I just switched off from them although I wanted nothing more than to feel love. From foreplay onwards, I always felt the same feelings coming back up inside me as I felt the first time I'd ever seen pornography as a 13 year old. It happened to me the first time I was ever physically intimate with a female and it shook me to the core. During lovemaking I felt the same shock, the same weird emotions, the same kind of out-of-body feelings.
Those emotions from when I was 13 had been around the whole time and came out forcefully to tell me they were still around. They screamed in my face from deep inside: "Don't you forget about us!" Instead of enjoying intimacy with my partners and growing in sexual confidence with them, I grew more and more unconfident, more nervous and more self conscious.
At my worst point, last year, I became impotent for a time as lovemaking just got so stressful for me and emotionally difficult to deal with. I think my body's refusal to get an erection was my own subconscious refusal to make love. I didn't enjoy lovemaking. I just felt numb. I wanted more than anything in this world to feel LOVE when I made love, instead of stress and nervousness.
Right now I'm blessed with a really caring and understanding partner but I feel so guilty about the way I am. I'm currently in therapy and gradually I'm starting to change. My confidence is growing. My guilt is lifting. The negative emotions are not so strong. I love my girlfriend so so much for sticking with me over a difficult time. She always says to me: "I love you, you'll get better, I'm with you for good so get used to it." :) Yeah, of course I love her too. :)
It makes me sick when I think of all the people who don't know that their partner or ex-partner has put their private home-made videos up onto porn sites for thousands of strangers to see. That is so wrong and abusive. It's violating. I hate porn and I wish I'd never seen any porn at all because of how it gave me such a warped idea of my own body image, what sex is, and what lovemaking really is. I'd be glad for the whole industry to collapse and disappear as there is no doubt, no doubt at all that porn harms. It scars and leaves haunting marks inside you that cruelly play with your heart and mind. Porn harms.
I just hope that even if one parent who is like my father comes across your site and reads my story then they will have some respect for themselves, their partner and their family and stop the harm they are doing.
Thank you for your wonderful AntiPornographyBlog YouTube channel and your awesome website. Good luck with your fight and BLESS YOU. :)
Greygirl (Harmed by childhood sexual assault, domestic abuse, and partners' use of porn and prostitution) (female, 40, Minnesota) (October 31, 2010)
I learned first-handedly, at the innocent age of six, the effects and devastation that are brought on by the objectification of women and girls in our society. Although I didn't understand it at the time, the ramifications of my new-found lesson would last a lifetime. I was gang-bang raped at the age of six by the boys in my neighborhood. This lasted until around the age of twelve when finally my brother raped me as well.
As a result I started smoking pot in the eighth grade to get away from my pain, and as time went by I graduated to other drugs as well in order to not feel the pain. Although my pain was immense, I had NO IDEA how bad it would become. I knew that life wasn't what I had been experiencing, and I had hope that I would find better people and LOVE once I was out of my home.
My first boyfriend seemed like a godsend. He worked housing homeless people and was self-professed to be passionate about the healthy treatment of women and children. (Sickened by the state of the world.) We became engaged and life seemed wonderful! I had passed through my hurt and distrust and was having a healthy relationship.
Slowly I began finding inconsistencies in his stories; strip clubs, porn, and cheating on me with hookers became the norm. Drinking was something we could do together, so I started drinking. My questioning him became his attempts on my life, anal rape, and physical abuse with everyone in his corner. I was "too sensitive", and due to my abuse I still doubted myself. After three years I finally moved on.
I moved into a home with a friend of mine from work. Long story short her married brother came into my room one night and raped me. While packing my bags to leave for California he came to talk to me and I asked him what he didn't understand about the word "no" and someone pushing him off, and he said, "All women say that, but they really want it".
California would be a new life, but I found myself binge drinking and isolated and again many abusive people honing in on my shaken self esteem. I started receiving counseling for rape and had many flashbacks and trouble holding a job. It was a time to grieve for all that I had lost. I stopped using any drugs and quit alcohol on my own.
The next relationship was with a Christian minister who was going to help me through my rape issues and teach me about the Lord. I was thankful to have been blessed with such a fine man, but again... sleeping with prostitutes and physical abuse were the outcome, as well as leaving me while pregnant. I started into group counseling for rape and sexual assault, as well as some individual counseling.
Four years went by while I was just trying to get on my feet, and I started my own pottery business to stay with my son. I felt as though I had done a lot of work to believe in myself and become an independent woman. Then I had another relationship filled with lies, infidelities, porn use, and abuse -- but this time it was only AFTER I had become pregnant. My boyfriend fractured my jaw and nearly severed my tongue ten days after the birth of our child. I finally had a voice and was going to stand up for myself: I pressed charges. But the courts did NOTHING. Counselors said we should get married!!!
I didn't follow their advice and would only see this man in public places. In a public place, at a swimming pool, he punched my then five year old boy in the face. I moved yet again to get away, but the courts had me driving two hours EVERY WEEKEND to bring my six month old daughter to see him. I started into domestic abuse counseling, attended seminars on advocacy, and then became an advocate against rape.
The next relationship started out good again. I was slow this time. He was a wonderful man with a great job. He was sweet about not having sex and about being there to help me through my counseling. He said he knew everything that I had been through and that he would show me what a real man was like. We finally started having sex, became engaged, and then pregnant. Again: lies = drinking problem = anger issues = porn addiction = online prostitution = me abused again, and again, and again.
Now my children are in the cycle. I only wrote about each to show that many victims go through more abuse due to the initial harm done. I have kept a 4.0 in school for criminal justice, and raised three bright, beautiful children who can talk about their feelings. I work out and eat healthy, but the PTSD and lack of self worth continue strong. I have done LOTS of counseling, but the triggers arise when trying for a relationship with a man. Again and again, I feel as though I'm doing well, but I am not. I am embarrassed of myself, feel ugly, feel stupid, and feel scared about whether or not I will find peace in this life. I am in both al-anon and individual counseling again.
I have met MANY women over the years who have been affected by the objectification of women and who suffer from many things: anorexia/bulimia, pulling their hair out, suicide, living in institutions, can't be in a relationship unless the man is married, became prostitutes or strippers, etc.
The devastation of porn and sexual abuse or assault is epidemic. I know that porn is used by many predators. They copy and imitate what they see with their victims. I know that many women who are abused believe that their body and sex is all they are good for. I know that with ANY objectification comes dehumanization. I know that my children are fatherless and living in poverty. I know that my life was changed forever due to the beliefs that this society finds acceptable for men, and I know that SOMETHING must be done.
Thank you,
Greygirl
Melanie (Working in a porn/sex toys shop turned her off men) (female, 22, Germany, YouTube) (October 17, 2010)
Hey everyone. I've been working in an erotic store for about three years now and I must admit it is simply disgusting to see what kind of pornos men pick. (The name of the store is Erdbeermund, in case anyone is interested or lives in Germany.) The oldest men pick the teen movies, the younger the female performers the better, and the more brutal the sex acts the better. We have DVDs about men sewing up women's vaginas and everything else you can imagine.
Working in this place has really made my image of men worse. Every second DVD customer wants us to throw away the DVD cover. Why? Because he has to hide what he is watching from his wife, girlfriend, or whoever. Sometimes we have customers asking for help to pick a nice sex toy to surprise their wife, and as soon as the customer steps up to the register he asks screwed up questions like: "Where is there a whorehouse or a strip club?" Or he even changes his mind on surprising his wife and ends up buying some DVD with men peeing on women.
We have porn addicted customers calling us all stirred up because they're waiting for a new DVD that was supposed to come out. These people spend hundreds of euros on some stupid DVDs! They collect this stuff. This is sick! One of them lost his wife and has a lot of debt because of this!
As for me, I broke up with my fiancé because he was (I believe) a porn addict. He came to visit me from the US for two weeks and had nothing better to do than get up and watch porn while I was still sleeping. All he had eyes for was girls and more girls. He loved strip clubs and everything that had to do with this theme. This screwed up my love and respect for this man and he disgusted me. Plus he had double moral standards big time: For instance, he loved all these things but his own woman isn't allowed to even take sexy pictures, and gay men should be killed but lesbians are hot. Since being with this man I feel like throwing up just thinking of men liking lesbians, men watching porn, or men going to strip clubs or whatever.
This man hurt me so much that now I truly have an issue just with seeing naked women everywhere. I got to the point that I started crying when I was watching TV or if I saw a commercial for the sex hot-lines or just some movie with women taking off their bras, whether it fits in the movie or not. And this is also the reason why I stopped modeling. It is because I see all of this differently now. I could have been big in hip-hop videos but I chose not to -- because it's just the same as pornography, just not to the same degree.
I want to escape from this but I can't. I have a new boyfriend now and all of these issues I brought from my old relationship have really caused some issues already in my new one. I am simply disgusted by men. My boyfriend, who is a sweetheart, once told me that he has always dreamed of a threesome with two women, which is actually nothing really bad. But I'm so mad and disgusted just because of these things that I had to go through with my ex. I even thought about going to a psychologist.
All in all these things make me go crazy and this "sex society" that is made for men pisses me off big time. I cannot even go to a damn regular club without being forced to see female strippers hopping around in front of my boyfriend's nose, and everyone always expects me to accept it: "Men are like this," "It's in their genes," "You have to accept it," Blah, blah, blah... Get out of my face with this!
Anyway, I am so glad that I'm not the only one with these kinds of issues. Most people don't understand it. I love your site and I will try to spread it to anyone who seems open to it. Much respect to you and the anti-porn side! We need more like you!
Lina (Porn ruined her relationships) (female, 28, YouTube) (September 6, 2010)
I am 28 years old and eight years ago when I was 20 I was in trouble because I was hanging out with some people who worked for fetish and BDSM pornographers. (BDSM = bondage, domination, sadism and masochism) I was working with them as a go go dancer and other bad things, but no sex.
I did it because I was angry with my ex-boyfriends. I found pornography pictures and videos on their computers many times and I was doing it for revenge. I kept thinking: "Why these girls and not me? Am I not sexy and beautiful etc.??" (I was sooo immoral and immature.) In a way I think that I got revenge against myself and nobody else. That was a real zero in my life, nothing good in my head!!!
When I started a relationship again I stopped what I was doing with the BDSM people. One day I found my new boyfriend with a dildo and he was watching porn with women and transsexuals. I felt so empty. :((( I thought again, "Why is he doing this? Can't I be loved? Am I so ugly? Who likes this?"
I broke up that relationship of four years and I spent one year alone. I thought that if I fell in love again I would be careful about what my boyfriend wanted and liked. Then I met someone and got involved with him. I was starting new and I was so happy. My new boyfriend was kind, etc., but one time he was staying in my house and in the morning I woke up and caught him watching porn on the computer. :(
I didn't break up with him and I'm still with him now. (One year and some months later.)
I talked to my friends and my mother and they told me that many boys do that sort of thing and that I shouldn't break up because of it. But we have problems with our relationship and we haven't been intimate in many days. Instead he masturbates in the bathroom to girls in porn, plus he wants me to do those things that the girls in porn do and I don't like to do them. :(((((((((
I am feeling very sad about my boyfriend as I feel things for him and it's not easy for me to leave him. I try to explain to him how hurtful it is when he looks at pornography, but he just says that it is "nothing bad," and that he just sees it as a game!
In addition to these porn problems with my boyfriend my dad likes to see porn with animals.. :((((( I am not feeling well. I really don't know why these men are so stupid. I am sure I am not like that. I don't like these ugly ways. Why do they hurt us? Where is the love?? :(
Porn is making war on love, knowledge, kindness, true beauty and happiness. Porn is teaching people to use their body in ugly ways, like meat!
People: Open your minds and hearts. Do good things in your life. Don't throw yourselves into the garbage. You deserve the true beauty of life, whether you are healthy or not. Make your brain think healthy. Do something good. You can do it.
--
Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you and that you bring me some happiness to know that there are people out there like you who understand how harmful pornography is.
USCUSCTrojan (Former teen street prostitute) (female, 27, U.S., YouTube) (July 11, 2010)
I was a street prostitute for two years. Started when I was 17 on Holt Street in Pomona, CA. It was the only way for me to afford going to USC. It was either continue my Starbucks job earning $300/week or work the streets earning $1000/week...yes $1000/week tax-free money. Yes, I was raped (2 times), beaten (3 times) and robbed (5 times) but after awhile girls on the street get use to that treatment because money is like a drug...and men give girls SO much $ for sex.
Raina (Stripping harms, consequences and regrets) (female, 22, Texas, U.S.) (June 7, 2010)
I would like to share my experience in the adult industry here so that people might have a better idea of what it is really like to do this type of work, not what the distributors/managers want people to think its like. I've been an exotic dancer (read stripper) for several years now. I started dancing soon after getting a job as a cocktail waitress in a strip club. (The old joke about the difference between a waitress and a stripper being 3 months). I thought it would be easier -- less days worked, able to drink on the job, no running around with a tray. Given the choice again I would never have started.
You go in thinking it will be lots of quick easy money and realize you're spending more on outfits, makeup, hair, nails, house fees (most clubs charge the dancers to work there), tip outs (required), club merchandise (required to sell or pay for it yourself -- I have a lot of dust rags that say" _____ CLUB"), and drugs (that you may not need to do your job at first but probably will turn to eventually to dull the emotional pain this path will inevitably bring).
First: the girls will most likely be catty and awful to you because you're new. They will not help you and may be openly hostile. I've had girls burn holes in my clothes while I was giving a dance, trip me, break glass on my stage, and even slip various things into my drinks (including acid - no fun).
It takes an enormous emotional and physical toll on you. It's exhausting (especially at clubs where pole work is encouraged), the shoes mess your feet up, your knees crack every time you kneel down on stage to get a tip, I've thrown my back out twice. I've worked at clubs with old chipped stages that scratched you up when you rolled around on them and poles that were flaking big chunks of sharp, rusty metal into your skin. (Hope you got your tetanus shot.) You will break out from all the filth on everything. (NOTHING IS EVER CLEANED, EVER.) You get zits between your boobs from rubbing them on greasy guys' stubble covered faces all night, you get chafed from grinding (starched jeans and huge belt buckles - OUCH!). You get staph infections from the nasty chairs that have been puked on god only knows how many times. If you work where you always wear panties you get yeast infections from sweating in what amounts to bathing suit bottoms all night. If you work full nude you are exposed to far worse. (Do you know what that nasty girl has? I hope so, cause you just sat your bare coochie on the same chair/lap/stage that she did five minutes before.) Guys will come in their pants and you may not realize it till it has soaked through your t-back. (Do you know what he has? You may have it now too...)
The customers are awful. They will scream obscenities at you, ask you to do awful things (especially if you also do web cam work, which is like being on a pornographic lazy Susan for hours - "show your ass, show your tits, open your mouth, take your shoes off, bend over, spread your pussy", and on and on and on.... I did this for two weeks and couldn't handle it anymore. Imagine using your dildo vigorously and in strange positions for 4-6 hours straight). Female customers will treat you like shit and call you fat, even if they look like Shamu. Many customers are extremely abusive -- I've been slapped, choked, bitten, burned with cigarettes, spit on, puked on, my hair pulled, clothes ripped, things thrown at me. Many managers turn a blind eye to these abuses, as they do to the use of illicit drugs and prostitution. Can you say VIP room?)
Managers are abusive, corrupt, or just plain incompetent. I was raped by a customer when I was black out drunk and the manager let him "take me home safely" and I woke up naked and bleeding in a strange house. Many other girls have been raped inside and outside the club, many times more than once, especially in badly monitored VIP rooms, but few report this because cops will just say that we were turning tricks and are just crying because we didn't get the money we wanted. In some cases managers will take pictures of drunk girls with them (and yes, I mean that in the worst sense) and use it to blackmail them into doing whatever they want. You will have customers follow you home almost every night (most of have learned to carry something a lot stronger that pepper spray). I've had some weirdo knock on my door at 3 a.m. as a "surprise" more than once. (But only once was said weirdo bearing flowers. Can you say delusional and desperate?)
Speaking of delusional and depressing there is the strange breed of the strip club addict who is often lonely and clingy (and not entirely stable). Many of these men are married or have children but spend far more time/effort (buying diamonds, spending hours at the club), devoted to women who take all their money and would at the same time happily take a cheese grater to their face. (Yes, we hate all the customers -- ALL of them). I've seen men run through years of savings and run up huge credit card debts trying to win over the girl they are obsessed with only to learn that they will never get anything more than a lap dance out of the relationship. (The last one pretty much paid for my house). This can obviously destroy families along with the men stupid enough to do this. And, yes there are sugar-daddy arrangements that go on but they NEVER end well.
No matter how many times a night you're told that you're hot/beautiful/have nice tits this job trashes your self-esteem. You're always wondering "if my boobs were bigger/if I'd worn a different lipstick/if I was thinner would I have made more tonight?" Consequently I've seen some really badly botched boob jobs (think cross-eyed). Eating disorders are rampant. (I've seen girls pass toothbrushes over the sad half-wall stalls in the bathroom in order to make themselves throw up.) Most girls do drugs of some kind. (You always wonder if a girl started stripping to support her habit -- it's the only job most addicts can hold down -- or if, like me, she started taking drugs in order to be able to go in to work and face the customers.)
Many girls are also supporting abusive boyfriends/pimps that they just cant seem to get away from. (I've seen more than one girl's "boyfriend" wait for her outside the club to take her money as soon as she gets off and maybe knock her around a bit if its not enough -- although the girl who had enough and pulled out a taser on the jerk who had been abusing her for months was priceless to watch. He cried. If you're lucky enough to avoid the pimp Jr.s you have a hell of a time finding and keeping a real relationship. Most good guys will drop you the instant they find out what you do and if by some miracle they don't, believe me they will get tired of it soon enough. They will get jealous of your money, or think you're cheating, or insist that you stop because they see the toll it takes on you. (Read: you WILL NOT want to have sex after work. Maybe curl up with a teddy bear and cry, but not screw around.)
Oh yes, let's not leave out the fact that you will be ostracized FOREVER for this job. People don't understand (or they understand all too well) what we really do and go through. When you go to get a real job there is that big gap on your job history with the ambiguous label of "independent contractor." What kind of contractor? Can you verify that lie, dear?
Well, I hope this has enlightened any readers to the real stripper lifestyle. Not all the glitz and glamour it's cracked up to be, is it?
Alexandra (Porn made her feel suicidal) (female, 19, U.S., YouTube, RandomPicturez) (May 18, 2010)
Hello, my name is Alexandra.
First of all, I need to apologize to you. When I watched the Sasha Grey on Tyra video I rolled my eyes. I thought, "Uh-oh, an anti-porn person!" After all, what's wrong with sex? And as long as children are not involved, who cares? Let people do what they want, right? Wrong. First of all, porn is NOT sex, contrary to popular belief. Healthy sex is about love, porn is about power and money. Thank you for helping me realize this.
I am not a porn star but I have come close. I have been asked to appear in movies and magazines. I thought, "Wow! That means I am pretty! That means people DESIRE me!" I was so ignorant. You see, now I realize why I wanted to get into the industry. I wanted to be loved and desired and told I was beautiful. But there was a really strange gut feeling that told me, "DON'T DO IT ALEXANDRA!" I am glad I listened.
You see, I was sexually abused (stereotypical, I know) and I was overweight as a child and young teenager. I felt ugly and thought no one wanted me. When I lost the weight I wanted to get all the attention and acceptance that I never received.
When porn stars talk about "embracing their sexuality and showing their confidence" I think it is a load of crap. Why would any empowered, confident person want to be in a business where men ejaculate all over their face? If Sasha Grey is so confident and so empowered, why would she choose this profession? No, I am not religious. I support anyone in whatever they do. I just am saying that there are other ways to show your confidence. Just because you choose to do something does not make it okay and I just think it is sad that one of the only ways a woman can make more money than men is to do this kind of work. : (
One time I was giving a guy oral sex and he told me that I needed to "suck it like porn stars do." I was crushed. I guess I don't measure up to them. My breasts aren't big enough, I have pubic hair, and I am apparently bad at sex.
And it is hard for me to talk about this because I get shut down. People are like, "Stop being a prude and crazy feminist. Lighten up!" I struggle with this and I need help. I have even contemplated suicide because of past abuse and because of how porn has made me feel about myself.
Anyway thank you for listening and being brave to stand up to the industry. You have inspired me. I have gone along with thinking porn is okay because a lot of people are okay with it and I didn't want to be an outcast or ridiculed. But thanks to you for helping me stand up for what I believe in!
I also like your story about erotica vs. pornography. I don't have a problem with seeing two people having sex on camera, as long as it not degrading and both partners are enjoying it. I would actually rather watch this than a bunch of violent acts. There definitely is a difference between the two. I can't stand how pornography has warped people's ideas about sex!
Thank you for helping me and thank you for listening.
Desley (Former teen prostitute) (female, 31, Canada, YouTube, ThusFar777) (May 2, 2010)
I am a former teen prostitute, coerced by an adult women who gave me shelter when I had nowhere to go. The sex industry hurts women by degrading them, devaluing them, and dehumanizing them. It does irreversible damage to men, women, and children.
Though society only sees streetwalkers, porn stars, strippers, and prostitutes as whores, they are really hurting and vulnerable people in need of help - but instead we kick them while they're down. The funny thing is, we are all responsible for it. We have all created and tolerated this hyper-sexualized society, legitimized documented prostitution (aka porn) and allowed it to be mainstreamed, which in turn has created an epidemic of misogynistic men who believe it's their right to buy human beings for sex.
Little girls and boys are having pornography ingrained right into their developing sexuality and they never learn how to bond or relate to others in a healthy sexual relationship. Then, in order to meet the demand, vulnerable and abused women and children are coerced, deceived, lured, and seduced into any one of the sectors of the sex industry - and quite often, several of them.
BUYING SEX FROM HUMAN BEINGS IN ANY WAY IS AN ACT OF VIOLENCE.
People out there are suffering, the least of these not being the women used in the sex industry. They are in pain.
Rhiannon (Unwanted exposure to porn) (female, 11, student, U. S., YouTube, zomthezombie) (April 13, 2010)
My friend showed me porn on Saturday... IT MADE ME SICK SO I'M HOME FROM SCHOOL! PORN IS SICKENING AND IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL! (idk if it already is since im only 11)
Follow-up comment:
thank you! :) you made me feel better :)
Anya (Has seen abuse in Las Vegas) (female, U.S., YouTube, 8Anya8) (March 25, 2010)
I am from Sin City and I have seen every level of abuse directed against women,
Pornography is big business to all these smut peddlers and they will kill anyone who attempts to interfere with their buying and selling of precious human souls.
I stand with you.
Anya~
sepasgozaram (Sex addiction/unwanted childhood pornography exposure) (male, 23, YouTube) (March 14, 2010)
Marked as Bro, i Need? help! i used too watched porn since i was 4 yrs old, my dad introduced me! (ive stopped now tho) i've had oral sex since very young (6 yrs old and also at 12 yrs old) ...and im sick of it! i have a sexual addiction and Tricked many gurls and i feel like crap about it!
Xiaoramza1523 (Unwanted pornography exposure as a child) (Canada, YouTube) (March 14, 2010)
Marked as spamYou have my support against this pron nonsense. I never really got into that masochistic pile they call a tape/dvd. These things ruined my childhood for being exposed to it at a young age. it has no right to degrade women and men to such a horrible level.
Max (Observed harm firsthand while working around pornography briefly) (male, California, U.S., YouTube, Lawborn2) (March 4, 2010)
Selena (Loss of trust and respect for uncle because of his hard-core pornography use) (female, Atlanta, GA, U.S., YouTube, selenadelos) (February 28, 2010)
I think porn causes divisions in families, as with like my favorite uncle whom was a big part of my life from my childhood up. I went to babysit his son several years ago and while looking to find his son I found a closet packed with some of the sickest porn you can imagine subjects like, incest, rape, teenies, gang bangs, etc.. this took my trust and respect for him, and made me really question my memories of him wrestling and playing games with me or holding me on his lap watching TV, were they as pure as I had thought? well see I don`t know that now and I can`t now trust him around my daughter and it has caused a lot of harm. A question to the porn consumers would you be ashamed if your stash was seen? What if passed away would you want your loved ones to find it ?
TheCyclomethicone (Pornography industry recruitment) (female, Germany, YouTube)
just wanted to thank you for the information you give.
I was asked by a porn-producer, whether I would like to make some movies while I was walking through a train station and I refused.
After I visited your website and watching your videos, I am glad I did so.
He didn't even care, I was underaged, which really irritated me.
(It was about a year ago and I just turned 18 in September.)
(For people living in Germany: It is the U- und S-Bahnhof Alexanderplatz in Berlin.
I guess, producers often look for porn-actresses in this area, since other girls were asked there too.)
Keep up the good work!
ilovereeceandomally1 (Unwanted porn exposure) (female, 12, middle school student, U.S., YouTube)
im 12 years old, and i love acting. i will never revert to porn, to become famous. those porn stars are/were people too, and i feel so bad for them. :( :(
porn scheeves me, i will never be in any pornography movies, videos etc., etc. also, i went to use my laptop this morning, and when i clicked "system resume" i found a webpage that someone had searched on. it said "fre lesbian porn" spelled like that.... someone typed it in!! and there were like 4 minimized porn pages, some regular, some lesbian.... it was very disturbing!! so thank you for fighting this nasty habit, that some people are unfortunate to have. :( :( i talked to my mom about it, and she had no idea anything like that happened.... so we think we might have tapped into one of our neighbors wireless signals or something. because we have connected units (houses or whatever lol) and every computer is connected, somehow. its a long story. but yeah, thanks!!
1776Exile1 (Porn industry insider ) (YouTube)
I saw some of the industry from the inside and it was despicable.
I had no idea the suicide rate was so high tho'
Porn is an industry of predators.
Porn is an evil addiction and a despicable industry.
The way the women in porn are treated is horrible.
It ought to be illegal for the damage it does!
Ray (Porn harm of country) (male, free hug activist, Indonesia, YouTube, lagodaxnian)
It's all about money..that's why everything about porn spread around the world like dangerous diseases that damage and kill. In Indonesia about 2 years ago,our government plans to enact legislation of anti-pornography in an effort to save the young Indonesian generation from moral destruction,but this plan soon hampered by a group calling themselves as pro-liberalism.This group does not like that law just because anti-pornography laws are supported by religious groups especially Muslims community in Indonesia.because the strength of this resistance, then our Government give up and kept pornography is widespread among adolescents in our country.and you all can see how moral destruction of the young generation of Indonesia now.they like to upload more videos to youtube which smelling pornography.
nacole (Sexual harassment) (female, 23, Tacoma, WA, YouTube, nackyn)
one time i had a guy talk to me and i like him but he was bad and send him pics of me in a dress and he made them without and he give out my email so i had all nasty guys always talking to me so i had change my email so now i am more careful who i trust.
I hate porn. I have seen what I can do to someone.
Becca (Porn harassment) (female, 16, U.S., YouTube, bleedingheart55)
WOOOT!!! this is an amazing page! :D love the idea of anti pornography and it would be an honor to become friends with you :D i've been harassed by a guy on youtube about it and it's pissing me off... lol
this actually inspired me to make a page? on facebook with my friend, Austin about being anti porn! (the best thing is that he's not gay! lol) loved the Tyra vids btw... it got three people to hate the stuff that i know... :D
Joana (Upset at female friends regarding them not caring about pornography) (female, 17, Portugal, YouTube, jfls23)
I'm a portuguese 17 year world girl.
This channel stands for everything I believe in. I never imagined that something like this existed because everyone? seems to be so...well, they accept pornography as a usual thing, as something that's part of the world and that shouldn't happen. People need to see how degrading pornography is. I got mad at my friends SO many times because they just DON'T CARE and it's frustrating, especcially to see that girls don't care about the brutality women live in these movies.
You have all my support, I'll be most attentive to everything about this channel.
This gives me hope :)
Jeremy (Feels polluted by pornography) (male, 24, youth worker, Orangeville, YouTube, masterj22)
i am big into he anti porn movment, i am part of the? porn generation and i feel so polluted and that i can not give my future wife enough of me, i feel like i have trampled my garden (song of samula), i don't see how i can love my future wife properly, and most of the people around me don't see the dangers of porn.
SOUPRUN01 (Suppressed emotions) (male, 34, UK, YouTube)
This site has really educated me to the reality what porn is. The interview with BellaDonna where she starts to cry talking about how she hides her emotions. In my case I have been masking reality and never developed relationship with women as a result.
CriticalKitten (Child molestation and pornography abuse) (female, YouTube)
Since when has it ever been okay to treat any human being like dirt? It hasnt. Since when has it been morale to use dehumanization on women or men and be aroused? I have lived both of these factors. And let me tell you, its scarring. I was exposed to pornography at a young age. Molested for 4 years by my own father. I will confess, when i grew older, i started enjoying the acts and pornography. And i am getting help because i realize it is not healthy. Unfortunately, others have not done the same. I had thoughts at one point of being in this industry, but thinking of it, would i really want to go back to the thing that damaged me as i grew up? Ladies let me ask you something, would you like to be called a whore? Treated poorly?
Not being treated as all woman should? I am a woman myself, and in my opinion, men should kiss the ground we walk on. Men, same question. Its degrading and its not healthy. I have night terrors. I am cold. I am hard. I dont trust anyone. I push people when all i ever want is to be warm like a woman should. To anyone who truely believes that pornography is safe and is not sending messages to other men or women, please contact me. I guarentee you would change your mind by the end of the discussion. To anyone who has been abused in anyway, even though you do not know me and will probably never meet me in real, i can be here for you.
Anyone who thinks that they need someone to talk to can do so to me. Anyone who is being abused in anyway, get out, get help, tell someone. And to anyone who is falling into the pit that i was and doesnt realize the snakes that are in the bottom, do anything you can to get out. I speak these words from my heart. Something that hasnt felt this strong in a long time. Anyone feel free to message me if you have any questions, comments or opinions. And remember - Any woman deserves better. I was treated like that outside of the industry. Its not something anyone should experience.
AngelicSnowGirl (Porn recruiting) (female, YouTube)
You're welcome. When I was around 17 or 18, I was asked to be in a porn. I'm glad I turned that offer down. Thanks for the friend invite. Keep up the good work.
becausewewantto123 (Pornography education) (female, Australia, YouTube)
Thank you for opening my eyes! Before seeing your videos & websites I thought I had an open mind about the porn industry. I now know I had an empty mind, NOT an open mind. I knew very little about porn but refused to pass judgment on performers because I don't like people that call women 'sluts,' etc. I thought they were shooting one scene a day. (Not repeated violent sex scenes with all sorts of risks & sleaze.) One scene or 5, I now know it's still disgusting. (Especially reading the extracts on your blog from Jenna Jameson's bio where she talks about the pitfalls of the industry.)
Watching Sasha Grey talk so cheerily about violent, repetitive sex & her 'roleplay' scenes, (basically 'child porn isn't legal so let's use an 18 yr old & dress her up to look much younger'), made me feel sick. I didn't know whether to hug her or shout at her.
You are doing an amazing job with this. Thank you for letting me know the facts & dramatically changing my point of view. Keep up the great work!
Maya (Unwanted porn exposure) (female, 15, Trinidad and Tobago, YouTube)
Hello from a fan. I'm just a 14 year old from the Caribbean but I really like your anti-porn playlists because since I was 11 I was against that stuff because I was exposed to porn by some irresponsible parents and the like...I would really like to be your friend and I admire your work and dedication.
- Maya
Nikki (Sexual abuse/pornography use) (female, 37, YouTube, souldecirce)
Gawker, a blog, featured an interview recently with porn star Sasha Grey. In trying to determine the truth about the "stomach punching" incident, I came across your Tyra Banks videos. I just have to commend you on the exhaustive, dignified work that you've done & continue to do in these efforts. I was introduced to pornography at a very young age, & was sexually abused. I, like many sexploited workers, have battled with warped views toward sex. Fortunately these destructive events in my childhood were intertwined with two married parents who encouraged intelligence & civility in their children. I have removed pornography from my life & have decided that I cannot support it. Your articulation of the reasons why it's so destructive are the most thoroughly convincing I've seen. I thank you, with all my heart. Also, thanks to you (& the auteur of the memorial video), I am feeling less ashamed about my previous involvement in perpetuating the porn industry, & proud of my stance against it.
I can't express the positivity that has infused my life since letting go of the destructive element of pornography. really appreciate the work you've done, and continue to do, APB.
alowlyapprentice (Pornography performer friend) (male, U.S., YouTube)
I had no idea that so many performers were dead, most likely due to their participation in the industry.
I once knew someone who was a former performer in adult entertainment. She started stripping, and then it eventually progressed to prostitution. When she met me I did not hold it against her. But it was obvious that her self-image was destroyed by the biz and all that went with it. She tried to commit suicide twice.
I'm so glad you found me. Until I saw your channel I was not aware of the great number of lives that have been lost or destroyed. Hopefully, informing more people can help prevent this. Thank You!
JosephKuD (Pornography and sexualized culture temptation) (male, 26, U.S., YouTube)
The truth is no women would want to be treated like this, the fact is, No one can justify why any body would wanted to be treated like a object for nothing. Don't realize that when your dehumanizing women like that, you begin to cheapen people lives. As a guy and a virgin, it's important to always fight off temptation and it's not easy, and to have everywhere you look portraying women like sex slaves. What type of men are we producing in our world??
ovuoba (Sex industry survivor) (female, 22, U.S, YouTube)
I'm lucky I got out when I did. I was involved in the sex industry and completely numb. I was so against it at first but slowly convinced myself it was empowering and also convinced others. Luckily divine intervention stepped in. I didn't realize how much damage I did to myself until AFTER I was out of that space. It's been almost four years and I am still healing. Sex is a very fragile thing for me now and it's hard to view men as human because I saw them as ATM machines. I'm paying for it now.
tammia1987 (Gets disrespected by men) (female, 16, U.S., YouTube) (x)
I 100% agree with u its disgusting all u see is sex on t.v
Im 16 and men disrespect me and it annoys me because not all women are like dat
Rebekah (Sex industry survivor) (female, 19, U.S., YouTube, TheKateleah)
Really do wanna thank you for what your doing about trying to stop porn. I used to do porn and prostitution when i was 17. I now am 19. I've been off the streets for 3 months. Keep doing what you're doing. :)
Sincerely, Rebekah
Jericka (Peer pressure to accept pornography) (female, YouTube, Punkie282828)
I'm honored to be subscribed to this channel! It's so hard to show people porn is wrong, and a lot of people that I know tell me not to think it's wrong. It's hard how peer pressure makes you feel so vulerable! I'm going to stay strong with my beliefs!
I hope one day people see their inconsiterance and change. I hope one day ALL porn is banned!
I am so happy to have found your youtube! it's amazing! :D
-punkie
Niko Eternal (Sexual molestation) (male, singer/lyricist, U.S., YouTube, nikoeternal)
Thanks! I was molested by a teenager at a young age, so I appreciate your work. Keep it up! =)
snicolesmith1984 (Young cousin molested) (female, 25, U.S., YouTube)
I don't do much on you tube except watch random videos, and it was during this time I stumbled on your tyra banks video of porn star sasha grey. the video on your page "mad world" was...powerful. I had to watch it twice and it left me numb. I have a young cousin who was molested by a 28 year old man. He was successfully prosecuted. She craves male attention and I think she believes she is nothing without it. She equates sex with love and to me that is the one of the most cruel ways to take advantage of someone. I think we have to teach girls early so they have enough self respect to not sexually exploit themselves. I don't think the demand for exploitation will ever go away, but perhaps there will be a handful of women saved, who choose not to walk down that path.
Brian (Observed pornography users are more like sociopaths) (male, 26, U.S., YouTube, wbarreguy)
Finding your channel was one of the greatest coincidences I happened upon. After reading in the news about the Boston med student, I ended up seeing a comment made by serial killer Ted Bundy prior to his death about how addiction to violent pornography the driving force behind his sprees and how he noticed almost every inmate in prison for violent offenses had the common thread of porn addiction. I'd never thought about that angle specifically, so the thought had weighed on my mind a lot recently. I thought of people I knew and the differences between those who are mostly porn adverse v. those who are heavily into it. By and large, the latter group really does seem more like sociopaths. I found your channel inadvertently while watching a new video by Tori Amos. Thank you so much for what you do.
Gaangin88 (Hears all guys use porn, but is a male and doesn't) (male, YouTube) (x)
Basti (Female friend got coerced into making homemade pornography by her boyfriend and became mentally ill because of subsequent abuse) (male, 16, Germany, student, YouTube, reggeadj)
I had a friend. A really good friend. She was like a sister to me. And she had a boyfriend. Her boyfriend was a ******* as******. (Sorry.)
We often said to her that he was deceiving her but she wouldn't listen. One day her "boyfriend" had the idea: "Lets take pics or videos of our sexual life." And she trusted him. He promised her that the pics are only for him/her, but one day all the young people in the region saw her in these pictures.
Many people laughed about her and mobbed her. So she started to build her own world... (In her mind.) Now she is in the psychiatric hospital....
Jules (Male choosing to not use pornography) (male, 36, Australia, YouTube, Onthebluebus)
I think what you're doing here, creating and inspiring is truly amazing. Hopefully many peoples minds and lives will be changed. I've only ever looked at a pornagraphic magazine once when I was young at 14/15 and haven't wanted to ever since. It really is unnecessary, degrading and something society could do without and would be much better for it Jules
LovedocPJ (Realized more reasons for not watching porn than religious ones) (male, 27, UK, YouTube)
hey thanks for posting those videoes real eye opener made me really think about my beliefs i'm religious so i dont watch porn, or woman being abused, but this helped me make sure that it was because it's what i believe is right rather than relgious guilt in a sense as in thats not what i'm, suppose to do, but yeah i'll be sure to spread the measage :) some of my friendsd need it lol
DisneyFansAlliance (Is forced by boys to like sex with them) (female, YouTube) (x)
caligirlhollister (Female friend first had sex in 6th grade) (female, Sydney, Australia, YouTube)
Bonnie (Has received offers to do pornography) (female, 22, U.S., YouTube, BonnieBowen)
taylor355 (Male non-user of pornography. People he meets can't conceive of this) (male, YouTube) (x)
I find this an interesting channel so I subscribed. I find it sad that as a male, when I express my opposition to porn, I am usually met with blank stares or amusement. It has infiltrated our culture so thoroughly that many people can't conceive that a male would be opposed to porn..apparently it is taken as a given that 'all men like porn'. How sad.
MELMOVIELOVER08 (Victim of pornography user harassment on YouTube) (female, YouTube)
Thanks so much for joining i am a victim of porno some freak on youtube wrote to my channel and said very graphic things
mm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hunter (Exposure to porn as a child eventually led to extreme porn use & addiction, causing him to miss out on other things in life) (male, 19, student, U.S.) (Feb. 4, 2012)
I got exposed to pornography when I was eight by my brother. I hadn't hit puberty so I didn't get addicted then, but I picked it back up when I was in the 7th grade. I started with just bikinis and stuff with no masturbation, but then it evolved into hardcore porn by my 9th grade year. The funny thing is that I knew what lust was, but I somehow didn't connect the dots between lust and pornography until half way through my 9th grade year, at which point I was addicted.
My addiction was fueled by loneliness and feeling inadequate about myself in many different ways. It has gradually gotten worse, and I don't know of a fool-proof system to end this. I'm in college now training to become a pastor, and am still very much addicted. I don't find myself satisfied with regular sex videos anymore. In fact I've almost watched gay pornography. I've watched many things that I couldn't have imagined myself watching before, and have missed out on a lot of things in life that I didn't want to miss out on because I was watching porn instead. I hate what it does to my relationships. I feel like I can't truly love a girl, and it makes me unsocial and frankly awkward around people. It's even tearing apart my relationship with God.
It terrifies me to think that I could still be addicted when I graduate. My Dad is addicted, or at least watches porn, and I just can't imagine myself being at that point without having defeated it. I feel like I'm not even a man because I can't control myself like I need to. I have told two people about this, and I think that has helped, but it hasn't solved anything.
Please pray for me
(AntiPornography.org note: We are a nonreligious organization but we do not discriminate against people of any peaceful faith, and we welcome personal stories about the harms of pornography and sexual exploitation from people of all faiths as well as from nonreligious people, as all such accounts are valuable in documenting and demonstrating the harms of pornography, etc. in order to educate the general public about these important issues.)
Daniel Ginn (Porn addiction led to use of more extreme & bizarre sexual material) (male, 23, England, Facebook) (Nov. 27, 2011)
My addiction was never an addiction to me for many years. It was just what boys did. Although I spent a great deal of money on sex chat lines, my parents never recognized my behavior as a problem. They just thought I was being disrespectful for using their phone.
From around the age of 16, when the free porn sites started taking off, my access to all the different kinds of material widened, and without searching for anything in particular, I found myself starting to view the more extreme and bizarre sexual material. I was never sexually abused as a child, and I was never subject to violence, yet the nature of the porn I was using was becoming all the more aggressive.
Like any addiction, over time the user's emotions and physical reactions aren't impacted in the same way as when one used the same level of material previously. The body and mind begin to demand more in order to reach the same pinnacle of release and euphoria. Unfortunately with porn, real people's vulnerabilities are being exposed in order to keep the addicts hooked. Men and women are being paid to lose all sexual morals and dignity, and have become slaves to the people who need their fix of sexual stimulation. But of course the addict is equally as much the slave as the performer. We are pulled into a false sense of security, told what we want to desire, and are given a hit of our favorite drug at the simple click of a button.
The fact of the matter is the companies with all the money are the ones that are truly destroying lives. Not the insecure girl in front of the camera, (who could have had many troubles in her own personal life, i.e. drugs, abuse, neglect, etc.), or the “alpha” male guy alongside her, or the depressed lonely addict who has been so easily exposed to the material like you and me. It’s the greedy, power-hungry control freaks who want to poison the world throughout. And as long as we click and their businesses makes money, for them there is not an issue! And why would our governments bother to intervene? While the average person is an addict and buying taxable pornography, the governments' wallets are increasing too. We have all seen the statistics -- nearly 5 billion (at least) is earned world-wide. OK, those porn taxes may not turn into the biggest source of income for the governments, but it’s a nice wedge of cash all the same.
The fact of the matter is I’m really scared of my children becoming addicts, or sexually tormented by some of the things that are so legally accessible on the Internet. Our addiction is so taboo that many of us suffer alone -- due to shame. If we push our struggle to the mainstream, and do it in force, then we really do have a chance of saving the health and lifestyles of so many generations to come!
I’m not trying to be a cult hero, or push people into situations they would rather not be in, but let’s use our suffering and turn our extreme negativity into relief and extreme positivity, by making sure we protect ourselves and the lives of others. Let’s give the middle finger to the greedy, and take control of the controlling.
I refuse to be held back by these people any more. I WANT TO FIGHT FOR MY FREEDOM AND THE FREEDOM OF OTHERS!
Stay strong and please share with others. :)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mike (Was addicted to porn & wasted thousands of dollars on it. Apologizes to women.) (male, 39, Creswell, Oregon, U.S.) (Oct. 25, 2011)
Hey, my name is Mike and I want to share my story of my addiction to porn.
Well it all started when I was a child. I used to find porn in the weirdest places, like an old logging road behind where I used to live. Back then I didn't know how addictive porn really is. Boy, wasn't I wrong when I got old enough to buy porn legally. I started buying magazines by the dozen, watching porn movies whenever I could, and masturbating while watching the movies -- or even when I wasn't. Watching porn movies became the norm for me and I also spent, I bet, all total on mags and movies as a rough estimate, thousands of dollars on that garbage. And porn also led me to do something I thought I would never do -- and I only did it one time -- and that was have unprotected sex with a prostitute, which I look back on as a real dumb and illegal mistake.
Being a porn addict stinks. To be perfectly honest I don't like to treat anybody with any disrespect, especially women, because how I see how they have a hard enough time out here in this world as it is. They don"t need to be degraded by smut. Yeah I said it -- smut. To me porn is nothing but garbage and it is highly addictive and mentally and emotionally damaging. Hey I'm an honest man -- I admit I view that junk and I'm not proud of it at all. i wish to God i could stop because in all honesty I have nothing but respect for women, and all that porn and all that junk does is degrade them.
If someone ever tells me or you that there isn't anything wrong with porn, they are wrong. It's addictive and degrades women, and in my personal opinion and in all honesty I think porn should be outlawed plain and simple. But again that's my view and I wish to God I never got involved with that junk. And oh yeah, online porn is another one they should outlaw. There is tons of free online porn and that is extremely dangerous, since young children can easily access it.
To all the women out there, I personally apologize that I ever looked at something that makes you look like a piece of meat or a sex object. But anyway, I hope I made sense and that's my story.
Thank God for this website and other anti-porn sites on the Net, and God bless AntiPornography.org -- you guys are doing an excellent job. Keep up the fight against the porn industry and with God's help porn will be no more.
Thank you again,
Mike
Gourry Gabriev (Porn use as a teen turned him into a hardcore misogynist) (male, 18, Maryland, U.S.) (August 6, 2011)
Trigger warning: I hope this doesn't upset anyone, but you have to know that men like me really exist. Not for the faint of heart.
I grew up watching porn videos and internalizing all of the othering and bad ideas that guys get in a patriarchal society. When having the choice to choose between sex ed resources online and porn, I chose porn, it being more intensely sexually arousing.
For one reason or another I became a hardcore misogynist. I frequented misogynist spaces where they would post real pictures and real videos that were posted without consent and tell real stories of how they sexually violated women. It was all real, and I couldn't use "It's fake" as an excuse. I'm talking really disturbing stuff -- guys bragging about how they'd sexually exploited a girl, how they'd humiliated their girlfriends and could "make them do whatever they wanted." I didn't understand that there was a person that they were hurting, rather than a "slut who deserved it," like I had learned in pornography.
At the same time I was watching more and more hardcore pornography, and using the "It's fake" excuse. Long story short, YouTube-like porn sites came out and I saw not-so-enthusiastic-consent girls doing things that clearly hurt them or that they didn't want to do, guys with girls who were seemingly mentally handicapped, and incredibly viscous real rape, often gang rape videos.
It turns out that I didn't care that it wasn't fake. I got off on the degradation and humiliation of women. I got off on lack of consent. I even felt entitled to do so. In hindsight, I didn't realize that I had many choices, (porn like that was a minority and I sought it out), and was coddled (and was coddling myself ) with the "She might like it" and "You're not hurting anyone" excuses that are common in primarily male spaces. I even used these excuses as I got into feminism, and started questioning myself and the misogyny in those spaces. I also tried to make excuses for the fact that most of this stuff was posted without the consent of the female in the film, or just ignore it, even though I know how I'd feel if I was in her position. I just felt entitled to watch them either way and didn't empathize at all.
Now I don't watch any porn, and I don't make any excuses for myself. I still have the memories of those real abuse videos and I try to empathize with the women, and it's working, but I still find myself getting sexually aroused or empathizing with the abuser instead. I am a radical feminist. I learned to fetishize humiliation, subordination, degradation, objectification, and even outright hatred of women long before I realized it was wrong. I can't say I learned this only from porn as opposed to society at large, but porn did a lot of it.
I am living proof that what they say about porn is true, and I'm sure a lot of men who grew up in the Internet age will have similar stories. Luckily I'm a virgin and have never hurt anyone sexually, but I definitely did have issues with women and I recall harassing a few women. (Not in an overt, actual touching way, but more like Nice Guy TM and verbal stuff.) I regret it all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
pure heart (Destroyed by porn addiction) (male, 15, UAE) (July 4, 2011)
Pornography destroyed me to the extent that one could not fathom. I watched it today, some time ago, and later felt so helpless about my addiction.
I got into it out of curiosity and now it seems like there is no escape. I cannot begin to imagine how I could get myself to see things I would never have even thought of. Pornography explores the darkest aspects of civilization which scramble your brain into thinking that it will satisfy your carnal hunger. To anyone who is watching porn, PLEASE STOP!! It will destroy you and erase your self-esteem.
This website, though, has been inspiring me for months, and I've had it with living the secret life of a pervert. They say the night is darkest before the dawn and my dawn has finally come.
Starting today I am done lusting. I hope anyone who reads this can get inspired to do as I did. Porn is a technological drug delivered through our computers. It's time we begin to control ourselves before it starts controlling us......
Jeremy (Porn use & addiction ruined his relationship with his female best friend) (male, 17, U.S., YouTube, th4Guy77) (March 16, 2011)
Porn is an evil thing. It will grab you and will refuse to let go. I first saw it when I was 11, then my curiosity grew. Now that I am 17, I cant live a day without it. Every hour is a battle to resist the urge to look at it. It is hard for me to be with friends and be with girls. I can't even look at a woman anymore without thinking awful thoughts. I have tried to find a hobby, but my will power will fade. I have taken up running, and it has become very successful. Still, the desire finds a way.
My best friend asked to use my computer, and since I didn't delete my history, she found out about what I did. She felt I didn't respect women and said she didn't know me anymore. When I pass by her at school, she looks at me, and I see in her eyes a voice that says, "Why are you doing this, I don't know you anymore." Once she caught me staring at her vulgarly, but as the good friend she is, she forgave me. Now she thinks I'm a low-life. She was my soul mate. No other girl made me feel the way she did, and I've known her longer than any other friend. I loved her.
And for those of you who say porn isn't evil, tell me this: Why is it that it has hurt marriages, plunged many in the grip of addiction, degraded desperate people, and why is it many of you cringe at the thought of not having it? Isn't it that evil destroys the goodness in your heart? When was the last time you looked at a girl and didn't think about dirty thoughts?
ninetyzero1 (Pornography use and sexual temptation harms) (male, 22, YouTube) (Jan. 21, 2010)
Hi. I really really thank you for this great effort.
Almost everyone who watches films and has Internet access would watch porn and sadly I'm also one of these people, and still find it hard to quit.
I friendly disagree with you in that films with kissing and sex scenes on normal films also greatly help in leading people to type words like "sex" and getting lots of results on Google...it goes on.
At the age of ten I was fascinated by female teachers who bent over quite often and were almost all the time wearing clothing showing a cleavage. I never done my class studies normally since I was 10 years old (since I was in year 6 at school).
I started by typing "sex" when I was 12 and it just never stopped and now I'm 22.
I really wish that women would wear clothes that don't show the chest area and I wish that both men and women wouldn't wear tight clothes and again, for men to also not show the chest area as that also causes sexual lust to most women. Cleavage (on women) also and very mostly causes sexual lust for men as soon as they feel that they can produce sperm. Unzipped buttons...etc
I haven't passed any exam and never prepared for it. I tried to but couldn't. I passed some with acceptable and very low grades. My mind was full of sexual thoughts all the time even though I am very tired.
Please girls and women I know it's hard for both females and males to stop having even a little bit sexually provoking figure but this generation can go back to being more productive like it used to be 20 or 30 years ago only when we try to have more elegance in how we live. I know that elegance in these days is also mistaken for fashion and see-through clothes fashion, but I mean the old one, the old true meaning to elegance where we can have men and women working together in the industry and in education premises without thinking sexually of each other or at least marry rather than do it in hotels and public toilets...etc.
Bob F. (Porn addiction) (male, 40, UK, YouTube) (January 4, 2011)
I've been a porn addict since I was 15 when I found a magazine on a train. I've struggled with this for so long, it's against my religious beliefs but it has plagued me on and off for twenty five years.
This site has horrified me and crystalised my long held desire to stop using porn for good. I've always known it is wrong but I was too weak to give up. The horrible truth of this industry has opened my eyes and provided the motivation for me to finally stop. I can see now how it is all a lie, the women hate it and are exploited. Us men are conned and exploited too, sad victims of our natural urges turned in perversion by this disgusting business.
Stevie Gaughan (Porn addiction plus other addictions) (male, 24, student, New Hampshire, YouTube, SoberAllmanBrosFan) (Dec.10, 2010)
My name is Stevie Gaughan and I am addicted to pornography; specifically pornographic magazines and films. First and foremost, I am an addict. I am addicted to anything stimulating, including alcohol, drugs, adrenaline, fast cars, "extreme" sports, porn, etc.
I am 3 years sober from alcohol and drugs, thanks to a recovery fellowship, God as I understand God, and my desire to be healthy. It wasn't until I was free from the stranglehold that these other substances had on me that I realized how much of a problem pornography was/is in my life. Pornography is not a focus in my recovery fellowship, so I never asked anybody about it. But my abuse of pornography was extremely problematic, especially in my sobriety. I know that if I start watching or looking at it again that I will be, as we say, "off and running."
Currently, I am 3 months clean from pornography. I haven't placed much thought into changing my sobriety date because I have felt that my problem with pornography is different than my substance addiction problems; however, I am beginning to believe that they are one and the same. My most recent abuse of pornography is such that I watched porn films on high-speed Internet porn sites, hypnotized for hours. It was affecting many aspects of my life, even my work life, because I wasn't sleeping; rather, I was watching porn for hours and hours, not even getting off by masturbating. Before I go further, I'll go back to my childhood.
I was an adventurous, happy little boy, growing up in a small town in New Hampshire. I had plenty of friends as a child and played outdoors a lot. When I was 5 or 6 I had a friend who was older by about 3 years. We both liked to venture into the woods to explore. He had a special place in the woods to show me. About 100 yards into the woods behind his home, there lay a fallen tree, whose roots created a big wall, behind which lay a stash of what would become the most fascinating kind of treasure I'd ever discovered -- smutty magazines! I think they were Penthouse.
Mostly I just remember being perplexed at the sight of a woman's vagina; of course any vagina I saw was very loose and unnatural-looking. I didn't know what it was, then, but the images I saw gave me the first high I can remember and you had better believe that from that day forth I played in the woods almost every day, even during the bitter New Hampshire winter.
I discovered masturbation a few years later and couldn't get enough, especially when I discovered that doing it while staring at pornographic images made the experience feel so much better. The way I felt when I looked at, watched, or masturbated to porn, is what hooked me. The images themselves are not what were so enticing. The feeling I get when I watch porn, whether I am masturbating or not, is as much euphoria as I'd get from taking ecstasy. Porn gets me high (PERIOD).
Although I am young, (24), I feel for the younger generations because their availability to porn via the Internet is much greater than mine was at their age. I didn't start acquiring porn via the Internet until I was in 8th grade. A friend had high-speed Internet access, so he'd make me data CDs at my request. I would make time to watch, as long as possible. During my high school years when I returned home late at night and high on drugs, I'd watch porn, jerking off or not, and often-times pass out while the films were still on. This is humiliating because I'm certain my mother found me passed out watching hardcore Internet porn, knowing I was also high and drunk.
College years gave me more independence, so I made more time to watch porn. I watched porn every day for at least 4 years, maybe longer. In my 3 year (and counting) abstinence from substances, I have tried to quit watching porno several times. The longest I have accomplished, prior to this attempt, was 3 months. (Last winter). Only in trying to quit porn and relapsing have I been able to identify with heroin addicts. (Heroin is not an addiction of mine). I will get a strong desire to quit, and then set off to do so. Sometimes my desire will last less than 24 hours, sometimes I make it for days to 3 months.
Addiction is such an insidious disease of my mind! I will make a firm declaration to stop and I will have an infinite number of reasons to stop, but eventually the obsessive, unhealthy thinking returns. For example, my thoughts preceding a relapse will say, "It's been X many days (or months), I can control it now," or, "Porn isn't that bad and masturbation is healthy. Hell, if I don't jerk off, I can get testicular cancer," and the classic, "F*ck it! I don't care!"
The mental obsession I experienced with alcohol and drugs is even stronger with pornography, and because I have been watching porn for so long, my memories are polluted with scenes from porno films that I have seen, especially those favorite pornos I watched over and over. I hate it!
Now, whenever a scene pops into my head, I pray for it and all scenes to be removed from my mind. Praying works but it hasn't had a "permanent" impact yet. Praying in the morning, when I wake up, works the best. I've been doing that nearly every morning for 3 months. If you do not like spirituality or religion, I will not apologize for mentioning prayer; after all, it's keeping me away from the stuff!
A word about the progression: Addiction is a progressive illness. I am a testament to that fact. With drugs and alcohol I needed more varieties and higher quantities to satisfy the beast. The same applies to porno. At first Playboy sufficed, but then Hustler and Penthouse magazines were necessary. I wouldn't even glance at a Playboy any longer. Then I became obsessed with lesbian hardcore scenes in magazines. Nothing else would do.
All this had happened by the time I was in 8th grade. Finally I found video-tapes and data CDs, which contained short porn films. In high school I only resorted to hardcore magazines if I did not have time to watch movies. I was obsessed with lesbian orgy movies for years, nothing else. Eventually I became obsessed with lesbian ejaculation.
I wasn't aware that I was transcending through levels or a hierarchy of hardcore pornography, and as I continued on to each higher or lower level, (depending how you look at it), the previous levels of porno no longer interested me. When I stopped watching porn for a while I then HAD to watch hours of hardcore porn to satisfy my cravings. Nothing standard sufficed any more. My preferences became cum-swapping, bukkake, lesbian squirt parties, girls choking on penises, etc. Although I never became interested in urinating or shitting, I can't say that it's not down the road. That's what my friends call a "YET." (You're Eligible Too).
Every night that I go to bed without watching any porn I thank God for helping me refrain from watching any, and then in the morning I thank God again and ask for God's help that day to help me abstain from watching it, rationalizing about porn, and obsessing about porn. I don't wish this illness on anybody.
P.S. I am in a recovery fellowship for my alcohol/drug problem. I know, now, that they are the same as my porn problem; that is, they're just embodiments of my alcoholism/addiction. The abuse of these things may have different consequences but the bottom line is that I am an addict and total abstinence is the only solution because I don't know what moderation is.
Regretful (Childhood exposure to porn turned her into a porn user) (female, 23, Blogger) (November 23, 2010)
I'm a 23 year old woman who has been looking at porn for about 5 years now. I've actually known most of these 'truths about the porn industry' all along, (such as the ones addressed in your blog post "Jenna Jameson's 25 Good Reasons Why No One Would Ever Want to Become a Porn Star"), yet continued to use porn anyway. The best way I can explain it is that in the heat of the moment, I sought out porn to aid with masturbation, and temporarily ignored my intellectual disagreement with porn.
I was exposed to porn at the very young age of 12, thanks to a careless family member who stupidly left pornographic files saved onto the family computer, and pornographic magazines and VCDs in unlocked drawers. At that age, I was disgusted by the acts described. Yet, after continued exposure over the years, I became totally desensitised to the rough, filthy and hateful acts portrayed, and lost empathy for the women in the scenes. I found pleasure by relating to the male actors in the scene, as it was obvious to me that the women were just faking enjoyment/ barely concealing immense discomfort.
Right now, I've made up my mind to give up porn for the rest of my life. It's not just because of the harm done to the porn actresses. It's also because of the harm I've done to myself. My lack of empathy makes me feel like I've turned into a monster. I've lost all interest in sex; my head is too filled with images from porn. I can't take part in 'vanilla' sex without being reminded of the despicable things I've watched and feeling turned off by those images. I carry around this feeling of guilt everyday; I've helped destroy some women psychologically, and inadvertently watched actual rapes. Those images will haunt me forever.
I don't know if I can ever heal fully by abstaining totally from porn. I guess I deserve it for the harm I've caused to others. I'm hopeful that maybe in years to come, I can heal somewhat; but I have a feeling I'll be scarred for life.
G (Porn addiction and recovery) (male, 22) (August 22, 2010)
I am 22 years old and I was addicted to porn videos, but as the days went by I started to notice that the porn movies are getting more and more ugly, disgusting, sick and brutal with young and innocent girls getting exploited.by the porn industry. Not to mention that there are some teenagers that just don't seem 21 or 18 years old, some even look like 14 or 15 years old and the websites declare that they are at least 18. The funny part is that people under 21 in some districts are not allowed to watch 18 year old girls being exploited by sick people that infect the innocent girls with their incurable diseases.
I am now over this ugly period of my life that was really making me sick, and regardless of what the reason is for getting over it, I'm glad I did get over it, and more than that I now have the courage to talk to porn stars and try to convince them to quit porn and start a normal life, so that's what I intend to do to help.
StrictAntiPorn (Porn exposure at a young age caused obsession & acting out) (male, 30, UK) (August 20, 2010)
I have been exposed to porn since five years of age through my brothers who looked at porn in their teens.
This porn stuff has taken hold of my life and probably brainwashed me into thinking porn sex was normal. During my teens I became a bit obsessive about it and talked about it all the time. I got into a lot of trouble and nearly with the police as well, due to certain actions which I will not say here as it would have been serious if it did happen. One of the actions that got me in to serious trouble was writing a sex story. According to my parents it was pornographic and I got taken to the doctor and was threatened with mental health doctors and police due to the obsession. But the other problem caused by porn exposure could have cost a job or two by talking dirty and offending some females.
However I cannot sit around people talking such filthy stuff as I do get a feeling that I should not be there. Once I just got up and went away. Someone at work said "Are you ok?" I said "I am to obey the laws of chastity and therefore this conversation is not comfortable." They all said sorry.
Personally I am now very strict on the Laws of Chastity. I was already slowly turning this way before knowing the laws of chastity via other ways of hearing harms of sex obsession and what porn does to a person. However playing one game made me think of the past as if it was a mental block, as it reminded me of a brother who was into porn and a rude song. When I did realise the filthy past it made me have strong hatred for porn.
I would like to see Pornography made illegal. In my view it is a Dangerous tool of the devil to bring corruption amongst us.
However I will not associate with people who have this kind of obsession or keep talking of this subject or I may shun them. Same goes for work colleagues. Also Porn is strictly banned from my home.
OvercomingAddiction (Porn addiction harms & overcoming them) (male, 25, Australia) (August 20, 2010)
I have battled pornography for the last 12 years. I've gone weeks and months clean, but then have inevitably relapsed. I had been doing really well for weeks recently, but was then starting to slip and was about to succumb completely tonight. Then I found this website, and it has completely killed off the desire I had. I CAN overcome this addiction. I know it affects my mood, my temperament, my interaction with my family, my girlfriends, my friends, my ability to be successful at work and all other areas of my life. It changes you.
PLEASE have the courage to beat this. There's others out there doing the same. I will, and I know you can too.
GlobalNonCompliance (Porn addiction harms his ability to have a relationship) (male, 20's, U.S.) (June 20, 2010)
Porn is addicting, more it is insidious and will grow on you like a parasite. Porn opens young men and women up to a world of pain and suffering that they could never begin to glimpse from the get-go. It starts innocently enough with a computer in the bedroom as a teenager, it can end with taking one's own life like many of the men and women you watch like to do.
It will tear the lives of man and women, husband and wife, girlfriend and boyfriend apart. It will breed violence and decay within the minds of those who worship and salivate over these icons of sexuality and smut. It can be linked to an increase in murder and rape, pedophilia and a morphing of the social construct of sex in general. Porn is a gateway drug to deeper hardcore perversion and sadomasochism, the darker sins of humankind... SEX AND VIOLENCE AS ONE.
People think it's OK, but when you grow up with a computer in your bedroom, what you end up watching after years would scare somebody who has actually participated in actual hedonism. I haven't had a real relationship in many years because of my addiction and lack of self-control. You may say that's not me, but we all have urges, and you open up Pandora's box when you watch porn.
When you view pornography there are certain emotions and stress revealed, and when this become habitual, those emotions change almost overnight to guilt and anxiety, because deep down you know you're not only objectifying those women on the computer screen, but you're objectifying yourself, and your future partners. Not only that you're escaping something that you refuse to recognize within yourself, some lack of self-confidence or rage at the world. You are building THE damaging habit and burning terrible images into your brain that you will always carry with you unto death.
A healthy sexual relationship cannot exist in many people's lives when porn occupies a young man's thoughts, emotions, and chemistry. The problems with pornography here and America only embodies a much greater crisis, a crisis of the spirit, or the lack thereof in this civilized world. Be careful what dark forces you invite into your life and allow to take hold, because asking them to leave only faith and love can provide. Don't you have enough escapism already in your life, to invite another in you may never get out?
J.L. (Porn affected her behavior/sex abuse survivor) (female, 19, U.S., YouTube) (May 23, 2010)
I'm not the usual statistic known to watch pornography. I am a homosexual 19 year old female who also enjoys engaging in consensual sensual activities. But I can strongly agree that today you've made a big difference in my life as to why pornography is totally unethical.
I do see myself becoming more physically and psychologically abrasive to the ones I care about after viewing pornography; I would impulsively hit, slap, or poke my partner to the point of annoyance, or I would make insults to her on weight issues. I would ask myself, "Does she really enjoy that?" while watching the grimaces and clenched eyes, (most commonly seen in heterosexual pornography), when I believe that sexual gratification is more expressive vocally as well.
Thank you so much for the clarification regarding the definitions of eroticism and pornography. You've really opened my eyes. I do not take pleasure in anyone's humiliation, therefore I will stop endorsing and viewing pornography.
On a very personal note, only once as a preschooler was I sexually abused by a stranger; after the occurrence I gained a very different perspective on sex at a young age; but differently I did not see sex as appropriate until someone becomes of consenting age. I did also believe at one point that pornography was "normal" since I assumed the girls who partook in making the films enjoyed it. Ideally people do things they love for money.
Psychologically, I was very repressive about being objectified as something sexual; I'm not in total denial of myself of anything sexual, I am passionate and have natural urges as a human. However it took me many years before I finally allowed my emotions to gather and understand that I was violated as any of the girls who partake in Pornography or Prostitution, the only difference is that I wasn't given monetary compensation.
People who obtain gratification from Pornography, Prostitution, or engaging in a sexual act without permission should considered getting their heads checked.
Thanks again for personally approaching me for my comment, and a thousand more for creating your website and making a big difference!
I3ecause (Porn influenced how he saw women) (male, 17, Dallas, U.S., YouTube) (May 15, 2010)
I've only used pornography to masturbate and I wouldn't say I was a porn addict, but I never knew the industry was that horrific. The examples they put on people, man I did not know what all these things were doing to me. For example: because of porn I saw women differently than I used to, kind of like sex objects. So I quit porn and I'm going work on getting my mind right.
Thank you very much. And I will spread the word!
aswtx75 (porn addiction/affects his humanity and relationship possibilities) (male, YouTube) (April 15, 2010)
I'm really trying to stop looking at porn. It's hard and in the past I have failed. Porn taps into this very basic need that I and many other men seem to have. It's easy to lose sight of the porn star's humanity and as a result slowly but surely lose sight of your own. I don't even know if, after 20 years of porn viewing, I'm capable of a real relationship with a woman. But at the very least I don't want to take advantage of someone else's misfortune anymore.
Jason (Childhood porn exposure/current hard-core porn user) (male, 22, U.S., YouTube) (April 7, 2010)
Hi there. My exposure to porn probably started at the age of 5 or 6. My grandpa was a mechanic and at the garage he had pin-ups and centerfolds everywhere. My parents were young and left us with their folks, who were and are quite dysfunctional. Grandpa would let us stay up late and watch HBO with highly sexual movies. Besides that somehow (still at a very young age) my brothers and I would find an abandoned cache of porn.
I am curious how it has shaped my idea of women as well as how it has guided women in a way itself. I am into filthy porn but I have noticed lately how extreme it has gotten. It has become an obvious sickness, women drinking milk enemas from each others' rectums, etc. Where does it end?
I am not necessarily from your point of view but I can understand it. That's all for now. Bye.
(Follow-up comment #1 from Jason)
I could love porn if at least the people involved cared about how they affect the world but they don't care what they do, no matter how much harm they cause, and I can't live with that.
(Follow-up comment #2 from Jason)
Porn has been the skeleton in my closet. I think I was at least a bit of a victim in the entire process. Strangely my uncle was anti-porn but raped me anyways.
(Follow-up comment #3 from Jason)
Damn you, you have me second guessing everything. I just wanted to watch people f**k, but I've spent a lot of time watching about the effects it has on everyone involved. I am a sensitive person and some things I cannot ignore, so I am considering trashing all my porn. Mostly because I don't want to contribute to an atmosphere that helps sick people like pedophiles flourish.
Ken (Teen porn addiction) (male, 14, student, Kansas City, U.S., YouTube, kpeking1) (April 6, 2010)
Thank you. I am 14 and am struggling with this problem. You have inspired me to begin the process of releasing myself of this "problem". I will continue to watch your videos and hopefully become clean of this awful problem that makes me feel awful, yet I do it anyway. I can't say it enough. Thank you.
Kyunshi (Porn user can feel how it changed him) (male, 20, student, Malaysia, YouTube, kyunhwoarang) (April 4, 2010)
I've watched porn stuff all my life.. but even though i didn't cross any line.. part of me want to stop doing it..i can feel how much it changed me..i'm actually making progress (to be a better person)
Juju (Porn user noticed degradation) (male, U.S., YouTube, ThisLittleBlackBook) (March 25, 2010)
In all sincerity, there was a time when i did watch porn; and then arrived another time when i was watching porn and it just wasn't sexy anymore... it was definitely degrading an demeaning and i didn't think it proper nor ethical to see a woman under such a light!
as you may have gathered from my crazy page you know that i love women and that i am a lover! what goes on in porn- in certain instances -is repugnant to my gut instincts in a multidinous of ways!
in the end, we have but, are gut instincts to rely upon...
now, i can't go around throwing blanket condemnations indiscriminately, but i will say this, the majority of it is wrong!
thnx again..
sepasgozaram (Sex addiction/unwanted childhood pornography exposure) (male, 23, YouTube) (March 14, 2010)
Marked as Bro, i Need help! ive used too watched porn since i was 4 yrs old, my dad introduced me! (ive stopped now tho) ive had oral sex since very young (6 yrs old and also at 12 yrs old) ...and im sick of it! i have a sexual addiction and Trciked many gurls and i fel likecrap about it!
Randy (Teen pornography addiction) (male, 17, Wisconsin, U.S., YouTube, emoisgay789) (March 6, 2010)
archnemesis35 (Pornography use harm) (male, 35, U.S., YouTube) (March 2, 2010)
I quit watching any and all porn several weeks back and I've never felt better, don't even miss it. Thanks to all the feminists out there who convinced me that the porn industry destroys women and transforms men into monsters. Keep up the good work!
tehn00bpwn3r (Ashamed about pornography use) (male, 43, UK, YouTube)
I came to the realisation that porn is a terrible industry a while ago and I am now ashamed that I used to indulge in it. I feel much better now I have stopped watching it and will never be going back.
People may justify it by saying: 'The women are enjoying themselves', this could not be further from the truth. Starring in sexual material destroys people mentally, and can ruin their whole life.
It is a shame that more of us don't realise exactly what's happening - but then it is being pushed onto and promoted to all of us. I suppose what really got me thinking is that when (hopefully) I have my own daughter, her degrading herself to the likes of 'exotic dancing', pornography or prostitution - all for a quick bit of cash, would destroy me... so why would I want other people's daughters to go through the same thing, all for a quick thrill. Hopefully in the future the whole sex industry can be put to a stop.
Great channel and keep up the good work!
Luis (Porn addiction) (male, 14, San Antonio,Texas, U.S., YouTube, xmaster963)
* EARLY EXPOSURE:
Most men or women who get addicted to porn start early. They see porn when they are very young & it gets its foot in the door.
* PORN ADDICTION:
You keep coming back to porn. It becomes a regular part of your life. You're hooked and can't quit.
* ESCALATION:
You start to look for more graphic pornography. You start using porn that disgusted you earlier. Now, it excites you.
* DESENSITIZATION:
You start to become numb to the images you see. Even the most graphic porn doesn't excite you any more. You become desperate to feel the same thrill again, but you can't find it.
* ACTING OUT SEXUALLY:
This is the point where men or women make a crucial jump & start acting out the images they have seen. Some move from the paper & plastic images of porn into the real world, with real people, in destructive ways.
wow all that has happened to me
(AP.org note: The description of the five stages of porn addiction was copied by Luis as part of his comment from where he saw it on the APB channel description)
Omar (Porn temptation) (male, 25, Morocco, YouTube, LionEntity)
Thank you :) I have just registered to your account. You know, I still get tempted to watching porn sometimes...even though I am basically against it. It makes me sad, and I know the reason why I get pulled by it, and that's because I'm single and I can't find someone with who to have a true loving relationship. Really makes me sad, and at the end it's as if my biology needs to ease off itself sexually, and the only thing at my disposal is porn videos....so sad, isn't it? Whenever I fall in love, I don't even think of watching porn. Love is the true cure for porn.
Follow-up comment March 2, 2010:
Thank you for what you said on my channel...i really thank you for your help. indeed, i'm (was) still struggling with porn, right now i haven't been watching it and don't really feel the need, but the fear of it coming back is in me...it's so cruel how they use our biological needs to make us want to watch porn. the last time i was going to watch it and decided not to, was a few days ago. since then, i haven't felt the need. you are right when you say that i should be worthy of love by stopping porn. it's true. please give me some more advices, some more tips...it would really help.
Aaron (Porn addiction) (male, 41, trucker, U.S., YouTube, gop4usa12)
Thanks for all you're doing to fight off the porn industry. It's absolutely amazing how blind we can be to the effects of pornography until our lives become damaged. I allowed myself to continue drifting into my porn addiction up until recently. I always figured I'd eventually "grow out" of it. I would set New Year's resolutions year after year, thinking I could just indulge until that date and stop for good. I have been living a double life for over 20 years.
I married, got divorced, and have three girls. Ironically my wife got me started into my pornography addiction. For my 20th Birthday she bought me a one-year subscription to Playboy. She thought if I read the magazine it would help our sex life. But all it did was make me resent my wife for not looking like the Playboy models. Our sex life was boring and I eventually found more pleasure in masturbating to the Playboy photos. I found pornography to be a convenience because it was all about my own satisfaction rather than having to worry about pleasing my wife. We divorced after eight years of marriage because we were both just bored with each other.
So I started buying more hardcore magazines. Playboy wouldn't do it for me any more. I remained hooked because of the lie that there will always be something better around the corner. Just check out one more website or just check out this one last porn star. There was always something new to be curious about.
have always known that pornography is wrong. But my problem has been not having an understanding of WHY it is wrong. Somewhere in my mind I could reason that since I'm not the one committing the acts on the set nor did I set the stage or hire the performers, somehow it was okay. My addiction progressed to me hiring prostitutes and having sex in oriental spas. I just craved sex anyway I could get it.
The one thing that broke this cycle was when I began surfing through anti-porn sites, starting with your channel here on YouTube that featured Sasha Grey's interview with Tyra Banks. Discovering what it's really like to be a porn star got me to the point where I don't care to re-inact their experience anymore.
Part of my addiction was my envy of porn stars. I envied them because I thought they were really living it up, making all kinds of money while enjoying nonstop sex. By visiting anti-porn sites I could see that they actually live a miserable life. I didn't know that so many of them have died of suicide, overdoses, murder, & AIDS. I also didn't realize how many are abused & underpaid.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized it was affecting my personal life as well. Every time I'd come home to my family I couldn't wait to get back on the road so I could indulge in porn again. I have also been lying about my finances because I couldn't admit I was spending money on my addiction.
So here I am, taking it one day at a time. I don't view pornography anymore. To occupy my time I read through anti-porn sites and I find more time to exercise. I could go to a porn site right now, but I choose not to. Again, thanks for helping me open my eyes to the truth about pornography.
heydaralon (Porn addiction) (male, 29, military, U.S., YouTube) (x)
Pornography desroys marriages. It ruined mine! I can never be intimate with my wife (or anyone) the same for that matter and it cheapens the God given gift of sex. Stop this horrible business!
marrillion11001 (Porn addiction) (male, 40, Ireland, YouTube)
Thank you for inviting me here. I'm an ex porn user and I came to realise in the end the wrongness of it. The shame and self disgust I felt became overwhelming. It has done me genuine harm. If you ever need any testimonial from me on what it does to those who use it, or want me to tell me story in full don't hesitate to get in touch. I will contribute any way I can to stop others from falling into its trap.
This was something I was slowly pulled into and then it just went on for years and years, with me constantly promising myself I would quit and constantly failing. It was just a vicious circle that went on and on, the more I used it the worse my relations with opposite sex became. The worse they became, the more I went into it. The longer it goes on the harder it is to break out of the trap. It is like being in an abusive relationship.
One of the things that finally turned it around for me was when I learned that 80% of serial killers who were interviewed by the FBI after they were captured said they were regular users of hardcore porn. EIGHTY PERCENT. Then I learned of the high drug abuse and suicide rate among porn actors (I don't want to call them pornstars). I realised I couldn't go on using it the way I had been, not if I wanted to save what was left of my self respect. Thankfully I'm getting help for it now, I'm in treatment, building my life over.
ChouaBoy (Porn addiction) (male, 22, Minnesota, U.S., YouTube, chouavue2)
hey thks alot. porn is so addictive and really make me shameful of myself. i have never told anyone close to me. i struggle to quit myself for years. now at a christain college, i hope my friend here would help me, but it really hadnt happen. watching this channel have help alot. i pray that God give me the will to pull through. recently i havent watch porn for a month now. i trying to fit other thing into my schedule so i wont be tempt to watch. so many other things also going around me, but there bigger prob with the world for us to worry about. not time for me to think about myself only. time for me to prepare myself and be ready for whatever God cal me to do.
just want to thks this channel so much for all that it done for me and for other who struggling.
dougcl79 (Porn compulsion) male, 31, dental hygienist, U.S., YouTube)
I like your page, and porn does hurt people, as it has for me personally
porn distorts and harms relationships...
I was first exposed to it at about 10 and watched it on and off for years...while I dont have any moral objection to the men and women who do it, I'm fascinated by the psychological state of a woman who is willing to have sex on camera with a complete stranger and allow herself to be degraded in the videos I've seen.
Well, I'm not defending porn, but keep in mind that most of these women choose to enter into the buisness...they are not all victims....however, I do feel sorry for a lot of them and do feel a bit bad after watching it. Almost like I am victimizing someone who is obviously screwed up.The issue of porn basicly destroyed my relationship because I thought it was ok to watch it when she wasnt with me. Her father had issues with porn as well
as my problem with porn progressed, I found myself looking up more and more disturbing things, the worst being underage porn. For this I have a lot of guilt and now I am in the middle of an investigation. I got rid of the computer that the illegal stuff was on but that doesnt make the guilt and the feeling of what you did go away. Porn is not just videos and pictures..whether you realizing it or not you are victimizing someone and poisoning your mind
thanks for letting me post
I hope i didnt come off as if I was defending porn...
tissetatten (Porn addiction/brainwashing) (female, 25, Sweden, YouTube)
I saw the price of pleasure documentory, and some other videos on your page, and boy am I disgusted, I always told my self, the girls are ok, they look happy (somtimes, doing all thes desgusting things that I woud never do) becuse I wanted to justefy my actions of watching this garbage, I cant justify it any more, I will try to stop watching it, (though its not as easy as it sounds whene ur kinda adicted to it) becuse I know it has ruind my own fantasy, I would never think of this kind of scenes on my own. Now I have to get them out of my head and start thinking for my self, What do I like, and not what I have been programed to like by watching some "producers" pore idea about sex.
I really think there should be some sort of rehab or meatings like AA, to ppl that have been watching this sort of thing.
JUNIOR6289 (Pornography addiction) (20, U.S., YouTube)
i give u mad props for doin this , i still have a addcition to porn but im trying to stop , its not right for all these young girls to have sex for money . good luck wit this page ill give u all the support i can .
gearoid60d (Porn use harm) (London, UK, YouTube)
Hello
Thank you for this wonderfully informative site. You are to be commended for the work that you are doing & for highlighting the startling facts & revelations that need to be exposed. I am not sinless in this area as pornography was seen as totally normal & acceptable whe I was in my teens & I never thought of the wider implications & consequences..
Thankfully I managed to kick the habit & feel liberated as a result.
Will be an avid viewer & follower of your site from now on.
Take care & thank you for the invite
Markus (Porn addiction) (male, 22, Germany, YouTube, isurugi)
Thanks to you I have been putting effort into quitting watching porn. So I honestly want to thank you. Because of your blog and the videos you have uploaded to show the painful but undeniable truth, I have been doing my best to quit watching pornography and further show the respect to women that I already had been doing.
The thing is, porn isn't only unhealthy for the porn stars but for us watchers as well. It twisted my view on women, made me view them as sex objects, and I wouldn't respect women the way they should be respected. I was always thinking about sexual acts every time I met a new girl or my friends.
It may not be a serious issue now but I know that it is going to screw things up big time later on when I get a girlfriend, a wife, or a family. People think porn is just sex on film, some with fetishes, this and that, but refuse to acknowledge the fact that it corrupts the way the viewers think, which may or may not influence their behavior.
You see, there is this girl I love, and while she may not return the same feelings I want to respect her as the lady she is, and myself. I didn't want my "mental addiction" to pornography and my "physical addiction" to jacking off to become an issue, so I decided it's time to stop. It's time to quit watching women getting humiliated on the Internet and in the videos. I'm not doing this for this girl I love but for myself. She is someone I care for and she deserves the respect whether or not she returns the feelings. Not only she should be respected, but every other girl out there, even the porn stars who got into the business.
These women in porn are being treated like dirt, like crap, and it made me feel guilty watching them on film. I feel like a jackass attending to my pleasure at other people's displeasure & misery. But thanks to you it actually struck me and influenced me to quit.
I honestly hope I keep this up, and I thank you for your time.
Yours sincerely
"isurugi"
r4scuache (Porn addiction) (male, YouTube)
I must admit that for most of my adult life i have watched porn constantly and havent realized until recently all of the damage that it has done to me emotionally and mentally. pornography isolates you from the real world and turns you into a sex starved person. pornography is exactly like drugs, its an addiction that will eventually ruin your life. i have a hard time developing real and strong relationships with women and its because i was so dependent on porn when i was lonely and got addicted it that now i have absolutely no social skills whatsoever. i have a hard time talking to women. the truth is, most women are not like those pornstars we see in films and they dont want to be treated like pornstars get treated on film. pornstars get paid for what they do, thats why they do it. real women are way way different than those depicted in porn films.
one final thought,i think porn is the reason 45 year old lonely men become 45 year old lonely men. theyre too dependent on porn for temporary relief of depression, but emotionally they receive nothing positive from it.because of porn they live their whole lives alone and depressed.they learn no social skills and think that we live in a world where all women want is sex,or to be treated like they do in films so that becomes their mentality. different types of people watch porn but i think that those that get affected the most are the ones that have never had a real relationship with a woman.i think we should teach kids more about being in relationships based on love and respect and encourage them to seek love, so one day we dont have to fill the voids with porn.
yowmc2000 (Porn addiction) (27, UK, YouTube)
porn to me was very much like tobbaco. i was addicted to it at one stage but deep down i new it was wrong and it was effecting my lifestyle very much. i have now broken free of this demon, and i am in very much support in what you are achieving. god bless.
Leonardo (Former porn user) (male, 20, Venezuela, YouTube, leopabon10)
At really, i saw porn every days after the school (execeps) i left it and i dont take again.
More than many months...I DONT SEE PORN, now i dont get adiccted =)
Para Cetamol (Porn addiction) (male, 23, YouTube, BASHKIRTATAR)
Interesting channel. I am a 23-year-old male and I must admit I am rather addicted to watching porn. It is good to see somebody who is actually against pornography, rather than getting confronted with pornography 24/7.Thanks for your reply. I will check out the links and do some research. I have never really tried to free myself from porn, but I think it's getting rather out of control. I don't watch any of the horrible porn that is mentioned in your Max Hardcore video. I always watch 'normal' porn, but still that's not good. I think my view of women is really damaged after all those years. Perhaps porn is also the reason why I have never really had any intimate contact with women. I don't know how to talk to women or how to act around them. I will now check out the links and hopefully I will gain some good knowledge! Thank you!
2prize (Porn addiction) (YouTube)
omg ur actuly makin me think twice about porn damn. but im probly gonna watch it in about 30 mins but keep up the good work =]
hey i was looking at your "five stages of addiction " thing im think im an early stage 4 is that bad considering im only a teenager
RealEros1 (Pornography use) (male, 22, United States, YouTube)
Hello. I quit porn only a year ago due to faith based reasons, but when I found your channel it give very detailed reasons and very reasonable combats to the pro-porn people who believe they're "supposedly" giving more freedom to others. (I am against pro-porn people.) I will be sending your videos to all my friends and to those who want world peace and so that people can find true love, not "porn," which is the opposite. So if there's anything you might need my help for you can count on me. :) Good day.
pitput8080 (Pornography addiction) (male, 29, Israel, YouTube)
FEW THINGS:
1. I'm a man.
2. I've watched plenty of porn ever since I was 13... (29 at the moment).
3. Porn made me look at women as pieces of meat that need to be Humiliated and all the nasty things that I have seen in the pornographic films.
4. Porn and prostitution is the same - Money = Meat.
5. Watching Porn is Addictive and like most addictions wastes a lot of precious Time.
6. I never regarded the down side of porn to the women themselves who take part in porn films, until I heard this girl Sasha Grey who has obviously lost all of her humanity.
7. Now that I Understand I hope something good will happen to her and she will, out of nowhere, realize that life is more than money...
8. I will Make an effort to avoid porn in the future so the lives of more people like this poor girl won't get screwed.
Thats it.
Nikki (Sexual abuse/pornography use) (female, 37, U.S., YouTube, souldecirce)
Gawker, a blog, featured an interview recently with porn star Sasha Grey. In trying to determine the truth about the "stomach punching" incident, I came across your Tyra Banks videos. I just have to commend you on the exhaustive, dignified work that you've done & continue to do in these efforts. I was introduced to pornography at a very young age, & was sexually abused. I, like many sexploited workers, have battled with warped views toward sex. Fortunately these destructive events in my childhood were intertwined with two married parents who encouraged intelligence & civility in their children. I have removed pornography from my life & have decided that I cannot support it. Your articulation of the reasons why it's so destructive are the most thoroughly convincing I've seen. I thank you, with all my heart. Also, thanks to you (& the auteur of the memorial video), I am feeling less ashamed about my previous involvement in perpetuating the porn industry, & proud of my stance against it.
I can't express the positivity that has infused my life since letting go of the destructive element of pornography. really appreciate the work you've done, and continue to do, APB.
Leon (Pornography addiction) (male, U.S., YouTube, zgenstru)
Hey -- I just wanted to thank you for the anti-porn videos out there. I'm still a porn addict sadly, but I'm pleased to say that I am recovering (slowly) from my unhealthy addiction. I still might need to seek professional help, but I'm glad I could receive some help from your channel and videos. Thanks again for the videos. :)
Seek1701 (Pornography use) (male, 31, UK, YouTube)
The reason why I'm so interested in this information is that I've heard from a lot of guys who gave up porn and had much better relationships with women as a result. I've also heard of guys having better orgasms when they gave up porn.
It seems that porn actually prevents men and women from forming sexual relationships and friendships and actually creates more loneliness and sexual frustration. It has certainly being my experience.
For me this channel will be a regular commitment to never use porn again.
Thanks for getting all the information out.
LorentJovet (Pornography use) (male, 30, France, YouTube)
I have become more and more disgusted and bored by porn and plan to give it up seriously and this wouldn't have occured to me if it wasn't for this channel. Thanks !
Peter (Pornography use) (male, 25, Rotterdam, Netherlands, YouTube, PeterTheZoo)
I'm very much against pornography as well, even though I will admit I have problems with it. But there's nothing "good" about porn. And, yes, it is the a major cause of rape and other sex crimes. Death to all pornography, is my stance.
Keep up the good work. ;-)
Peter
Christian (Pornography struggles) (male, 24, U.S., YouTube, vometcomet)
Thank you for the kind words you left on my channel. I am happy to lend my support to such a noble cause. I have struggled with pornography much and still continue in this struggle. Your channel is enlightening and informative. God bless you--Christian.
AVoiceCrying33 (Pornography addiction) (male, 33, Madison, WI, U.S., retail worker, YouTube)
speedcruz (Pornography addiction) (male, Belfast, Ireland, YouTube)
As someone who suffered with pornography addiction, I can only wish you the absolute best of luck in what you're doing. Pornography almost distroyed my life, I don't want that happening to anyone.
TheStrokes229 (Pornography user) (male, U.S., YouTube)
I want to thank you for everything. You are doing a very noble and heroic deed. Your videos & ideas are great and I am so glad someone is speaking out against this issue in a respectful & reasonable manner. I must admit I have watched porn and I used to think it was harmless. But your videos have changed my views on it and I realize that when people watch porn, they are promoting the problem, which is harmful. I will no longer promote these videos that degrade women & promote abusive behavior.
Mitch (Pornography use) (male, 30, South Africa/U.S., YouTube, mitchee009)
hi dear friend,
i call you dear friend, because your channel has taught me very powerfully. as a young man, i have watched porn, but after your enlightening words, and especially, watching the Tyra Banks interviewing the 16 year old prostitute, and Sasha Grey; wow... very meaningful to me as a young man. i have always loved woman, in a very heartfelt way, but still was attracted to the eroticsm of porn. all my friends, some family, and men i was around and i liked porn, and many still do. but as i grow older, and appreciate the Power of a woman, and her heart and emotional realm, that is definitely beyond us men, i have come to sincerely appreciate this.
it is an honor to know and be friends with you, because you have certainly empowered me as a young man of 29, and with out a doubt, deeply improved me into a better, more conscious man.
Namaste,
mitch
IamAwake86 (Pornography and sex addiction) (male, 41, U.S., YouTube)
Wonderful to see this kind of channel. As a recovering sex and pornography addict, I would like to say that there is hope. Pornography destroyed my life and held me in its evil grip for many years. It severely impaired my ability to have a healthy, loving intimate relationship. For a time I thought that I was hopelessly impaired that sex without abuse, dominance and cruelty was not possible for me. That a healthy loving relationship was beyond my grasp. I no longer believe that. Through 12 step programs and support groups I have been abstinate and porn free by the grace of God for almost 4 years. Thank you for letting me share and God Bless
nijeshniju (Pornography user) (male, 22, India, YouTube)
Hello.
I am a guy just like most young people that blog, chat and go online for sexy photos, etc. That's how I know porn star Sasha Grey. I heard that she had a bad past life, and I came to YouTube to search for more info.
I was in tears while watching your videos of Sasha on the Tyra show. She is really addicted and more and more people are getting addicted. I used to watch pornos, but now I have a sense of awakening against it, and special thanx to you for that.
I love your idea and intention to stop this, and I too am seriously saying that this has to be stopped.
Can we think about creating a society, not thinking of profits, but a strong one against porn, etc.? Not in a very aggressive way, but in a way to help rehabilitate and awaken society?
Special thanx to you to make me a little different in thinking and lifestyle. I respected women before, but I came to know what they really are through your work. Thanx for that.
God bless
Nijesh CR
Tim (Pornography addiction) (male, 41, nurse, UK, YouTube, ZenBarracuda)
I started drinking when I was in was 22. I quit drinking three years ago. I became addicted to porn when I was just 13. I think the only way I can possibly give it up now is by way of a cold, hard shock. I need a moment of clarity. I thank you for the work you are doing here. I will continue to view your information. If you succeed in preventing just one person from viewing porn then your efforts will have been worthwhile. Finally, let me just say, your kindness, love and compassion has touched my heart.
TGB18GLYNN (Questioning pornography use) (male, 20, U.S., YouTube)
P3AC3B0Y (Pornography addiction) (male, 17, Norway, YouTube)
freakypapa (Pornography addiction) (male, 23, Malaysia, YouTube)
EPcentral (Pornography addiction) (male, 14, U.S., YouTube) (x)
Allen (Pornography addiction. Lost his marriage because of it and risks losing his son) (male, 32, U.S., YouTube, freespeachrulez)
lorddagmawi (Pornography use harm) (male, YouTube)
|
