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The above is excerpted from a statement by Pamela Paul. This is one of the main problems with being anti-pornography. Not every woman who desires to do so has the luxury of having sex with another live, completely engaged individual. Some of us are homebound-disabled Involuntary Celebates for whom pornographic images are the closest thing to sex with another person we will ever get to experience. I don't see how it could ever be a positive thing to deprive someone of what is ultimately the closest they can get to sex.
I am in the process of completing a humorous book about my own, and other women's experiences in the same situation: 'You Want Me To Do WHAT With That?! The Life Expectancy of a Relationship With a Porn Addict©.' (A second book, 'Confessions of a Love Addict©', will be following shortly, based on the women who tend to find themselves drawn to emotionally unavailable men.)
Although it is written in a humorous vein, it is nonetheless a hard hitting book. It doesn't pull any punches, it won't accept any excuses - yours or his - and it may save your sanity, and perhaps even your life!
I got into it out of curiosity and now it seems like there is no escape. I cannot begin to imagine how I could get myself to see things I would never have even thought of. Pornography explores the darkest aspects of civilization which scramble your brain into thinking that it will satisfy your carnal hunger. To anyone who is watching porn, PLEASE STOP!! It will destroy you and erase your self-esteem. This website, though, has been inspiring me for months, and I've had it with living the secret life of a pervert. They say the night is darkest before the dawn and my dawn has finally come. Starting today I am done lusting. I hope anyone who reads this can get inspired to do as I did. Porn is a technological drug delivered through our computers. It's time we begin to control ourselves before it starts controlling us......
Not saying that I have ever watched porn, but I know that I've caught my sister looking at it and it was girl-guy stuff but it was gross. She was on the computer that everyone can see what she's doing too! I mean, I got a glance since she was taking forever and it was horrible! I told my mom and she told my sister (23) to watch that kind of stuff in her bedroom.
I will never ever do any kind of porn or prostitution in my life after checking this website out.
There were times that if I didn't feel like having sex, he would pretty much talk me into it somehow, or force me sometimes if alcohol was involved. He is a very educated and intelligent person, so I was driven to a state of denial and believed that all of this was ok in a sense even though in the back of my head I knew it wasn't.
I found porn clips on his computer sometimes and I know that he watched it, but I suspect it was more often than I liked to believe. Even his mother said she found some on the family computer once after he'd visited for the holidays. She described it as "bad porn", so I suspect it was violent or degrading. For years our sex life was simply whatever was pleasing to him. I never had an orgasm and it didn't matter to him and honestly, not to me either as I just wanted to get it over with.
After looking on your site, I've realized that, almost without a doubt, porn was influencing this in some ways. It wasn't always this way, but when I began finding things on his computer was around the time this sort of sexual behavior began.
I'd like to thank and support you for educating people on the harms this can cause in many aspects of life, including intimate relationships. I look back and wish I'd been more aware of what was causing him to act this way sexually and why, and that it was not normal in any way. We're no longer together, but now I know I can look for these things in the future.
This site has horrified me and crystalised my long held desire to stop using porn for good. I've always known it is wrong but I was too weak to give up. The horrible truth of this industry has opened my eyes and provided the motivation for me to finally stop. I can see now how it is all a lie, the women hate it and are exploited. Us men are conned and exploited too, sad victims of our natural urges turned in perversion by this disgusting business.
Good luck with your fight. BLESS YOU. :)
Thank you again for visiting! Please come back in the future as more content will be added to this website regularly. Also please don't forget to sign up for the AntiPornography.org newsletter here.
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NEW AND NOW AVAILABLE!
Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality
- by Gail Dines
Two - Pop goes the Porn Culture: Mainstreaming Porn
Three - From the Backstreet to Wall Street: The Big Business of Porn
Four - Grooming For Gonzo: Becoming a Man in a Porn Culture
Five - Leaky Images: How Porn Seeps into Men’s Lives
Six - Visible or Invisible: Growing up Female in a Porn Culture (Excerpt)
(Click here for full chapter)
Seven - Racy Sex, Sexy Racism: Porn from the Dark Side (Excerpt)
Eight - Children: The Final Taboo
Conclusion - Fighting Back
CLICK PICTURE ABOVE OR HERE TO ORDER "PORNLAND" AT AMAZON.COM NOW
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*All donations made will go to support the work of AntiPornography.org in fighting against the harms of pornography, prostitution, sex trafficking, and other forms of sexual exploitation and abuse. While our own 501(c)(3) nonprofit status is in progress donations are routed through the anti-sex trafficking nonprofit organization Captive Daughters, a sister organization who is our IRS 501(c)(3) nonprofit fiscal sponsor. Captive Daughters does not fund our work but they currently facilitate nonprofit tax deductible donations for AntiPornography.org because some of our work is a continuation of Captive Daughter's work addressing pornography as a demand factor for sex trafficking. For more information about Captive Daughter's important work on this issue please see the Captive Daughters conference: Pornography: Driving the Demand in International Sex Trafficking and their book: Pornography: Driving the Demand in International Sex Trafficking. Thank you.
For more information about the documented harms of pornography please visit the extremely informative new website Pornography Harms at PornHarms.com.
This outstanding website comprehensively addresses the harms of pornography in regards to all of the following categories: addiction, brain science, children, cybersex, family, Internet, Internet safety, marriage, men, psychological, prostitution, relationships, research, self image, sex trafficking, sexting, sexual violence, societal, STDs, teens, and women.
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"Frequently Asked Questions & Responses to Pro-Pornography Arguments"
"Pornography is everywhere, and as it becomes more common in all forms of media, it is also becoming more sexist, violent, and graphic. These forms of pornography are also becoming more and more common among children and teens. Why we should worry about pornified America."
Pamela Paul from Witherspoon Institute on Vimeo.
For videos of panel discussions with Pamela Paul, as well as links to all of her articles and her other groundbreaking work addressing the harms of pornography, including her testimony for the Senate Judiciary Committee hearing, "Why the Government Should Care about Pornography,” as well as information about her best-selling book, "Pornified: How Pornography Is Damaging Our Lives, Our Relationships, and Our Families," please see our page on this website about the work of Pamela Paul. Click here.
For all videos and papers from "The Social Costs of Pornography" conference, please click here. For the full 2010 final report from the conference, "The Social Costs of Pornography: A Statement of Findings and Recommendations," please click here.
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~~ NO-PORN PLEDGE ~~
Have you taken the NO-PORN PLEDGE at NoPornPledge.com yet? If not, now would be a really great time to do so! Please click here or the banner below.
~~~~~
See the list of many people from all around the world who have signed the No-Porn Pledge. Click here.
Read the reasons why they have signed in the No-PornPledge Guestbook. Click here. Don't forget to join them by signing the pledge and sharing your reasons why in the guestbook there as well!
From NoPornPledge.com:
"Join a growing number of people who have made a decision to eliminate porn from their lives. Sign your name, and publicly declare that you won't use porn, or have an intimate relationship with anyone who does."
~~ TAKE THE PLEDGE NOW ~~
~ Anti-Sexism, Anti-Exploitation, Anti-Slavery, Anti-Violence ~
Pro-Education, Pro Safe, Respectful, Equality-Based Sexuality
Pro-reasonable regulation of the pornography industry for the health and safety of the performers.
*Please see FAQ for more information on all of the above. Thank you!
~~~~~~~~ PETITION ~~~~~~~~~
A concerned citizen has started an anti-pornography petition at The Petition Site addressing the issue of free porn sites on the Internet.
Note for clarification: This is not an AntiPornography.org petition and the concerned citizen who started the petition is not affiliated with this organization. A link to the petition is posted here at the request of the petition author.
(All those marked with * are friends, subscribers, or followers of AntiPornography.org at our social networking projects at YouTube, MySpace, or Twitter or have demonstrated support for our work otherwise, such as providing content for this website or linking to us or to one of our blogs and/or social networking projects. Also please note that the below list is a work in progress and that it is not complete. Please share any errors or omissions here. Thank you!)
WOMEN AND GIRLS FOCUSED RESOURCES:
(For family, children, men and addiction focused resources, please scroll down.)
ANTI-PORNOGRAPHY ORGANIZATIONS GROUPS AND WEBSITES:
*Stop Porn Culture *Anti-Porn Activist Network *No Porn Northampton
No Porn Pledge One Angry Girl Anti-Porn Resource Center *Against Pornography
*Anti-Porn Feminists (Anti-Porn London) Playboy: Talkin' Trash *Girls Against Porn
Pink Cross Foundation Bin the Bunny *Feminist Against Porn Alliance *The Rise of Eros
*JoinPornBusters YouTube Channel The Price of Pleasure Documentary Film Website
*Make Love Not Porn (Not technically anti-porn but shows differences of porn vs. real life.)
Somebody's Daughter *The Anti Porn Men Project *Fight the New Drug
Polaris Project Breaking Free SAGE (Standing Against Global Exploitation)
The Lola Green Baldwin Foundation Stop Demand Foundation Genderberg
*SCASE (Scottish Coalition Against Sexual Exploitation) Our Voices Matter
*CAASE (Chicago Coalition against Sexual Exploitation) *Sex Work Recovery
*BSCC (Bilateral Safety Corridor Coalition) Beauty from Ashes *Not for Sale Campaign
New York Anti-Trafficking Coalition Coalition for Action on Sexism and True Equality
*Is There Something I Can Do? *StAT (Stand Against Trafficking) *Stop Slavery Here
*Artists United for Social Justice Freedom & Justice Center (For Prostitution Resources)
Donna M. Hughes, PhD (Dignity List) Chicago Coalition for the Homeless
Illinois Coalition Against Sexual Assault Minnesota Coalition Against Sexual Assault
*Equality Now *The F-Word *Off Our Backs *Women for Women International
Object (UK) *Global Fund for Women *London Feminist Network *Feminist.com
*The National Organization for Women (NOW) Feminist Majority Foundation (FMF)
*Feminist Campus Ms. Magazine *Safe World 4 Women *Women's Law Society
*WomensLaw.org *U.S. Department of State's Office of Global Women's Issues
*SIGI.org *GlobalSister.org FeministGifts.com *The Date Safe Project *VAWNet
*No Statute of Limitations *RAINN (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network)
*The National Domestic Violence Hotline *Guard Yourself Now
Chicago Foundation for Women *The Women's Media Center The F-Files
*Free Girl Foundation *Girls Fight Back *The Girl Effect *Girls for Gender Equity
*Girl Fest Hawaii *Girl Fest Bay Area *Rain & Thunder *Women's Space
MEN AGAINST SEXISM, VIOLENCE, SEXUAL EXPLOITATION & ABUSE, ETC.
NOMAS (National Organization of Men Against Sexism ) *NOMAS Boston
*Men Can Stop Rape *My Strength Campaign *Men Stopping Violence
*MASV (Men Against Sexual Violence) *The White Ribbon Campaign (CA)
*Allies Against Rape Culture *Men Against Rape and Sexism
*Feminist Fred Stan Goff *Byron Hurt The Anti Porn Men Project
Jackson Katz 10 Things Men Can Do to Prevent Gender Violence
MEDIA, FREE SPEECH, & OTHER ORGANIZATIONS, GROUPS & SITES:
*Media Watch *Media Education Foundation Women's Institute for Freedom of the Press
Miboda Agency
MESSAGE BOARDS AND FORUMS FOR HELP, INFORMATION & SUPPORT:
LiveJournal Against Pornography Community Genderberg (Feminist)
(Note: More content will be visible at above two boards after sign-up and approval)
FAMILY, CHILDREN, MEN & ADDICTION FOCUSED RESOURCES:
ANTI-PORNOGRAPHY ORGANIZATIONS, GROUPS, AND WEBSITES:
*Pornography Harms *Enough Is Enough *CP80 Internet Porn Solution
ProtectKids.com Victims of Pornography Citizens Against Pornography
National Law Center for Children and Families *Traffic Control, the Movie
*Porn Nation Morality in Media Maryland Coalition Against Pornography
*Teens Against Porn Utah Coalition Against Pornography BraveHearts
Report Online Child Pornography/Exploitation at CyberTipLine.com or 1-800-843-5678
*Darkness 2 Light *XXX Church Department of Justice ThePornTalk.com
Social Costs of Pornography: Conference Videos Papers Report of Findings
*Safe Eyes (InternetSafety.com) *Convenant Eyes Internet Filter Review
*Women for Decency AntiChildPorn.org
Vice Report - News on impact of pornography & sex addiction, new technology, legal issues for employers, etc.
Canadians Addressing Sexual Exploitation (C.A.S.E.) (Canada)
CANADA - List of other anti-pornography and related Canadian organizations
(Scroll down on above link to get to the list of organizations)
ANTI-PORNOGRAPHY ACTIVIST INDIVIDUALS, AUTHORS, AND THERAPISTS:
*Pat Trueman (Founder of Pornography Harms) Pamela Paul (Author of "Pornified")
Dr. Jill C. Manning (Author:"What's the Big Deal about Pornography? A Guide for the Internet Generation")
Dr. Judith Reisman *Dr. Robi Sonderegger
ANTI-PROSTITUTION/TRAFFICKING/SEXUAL EXPLOITATION/ABUSE SITES, ETC:
*Shared Hope International EndDemand.org *The Defenders USA Free the Slaves
*IJM Institute (International Justice Mission) *Global Centurion *Live2free
*ECPAT - USA (End Child Prostitution & Trafficking) *Beyond Borders (ECPATCanada)
*T-Stop (Texas Sex Trafficking Obliteration Project) *Love146 NYC Task Force
*End Slavery NT (End Slavery in Tennessee and Beyond) *Chab Dai Coalition
*Justice and Care (South Asia) *Rock Against Slavery End Demand
Overexposed, the Movie Call and Response, the Movie *Nowhere2Hide
CASEY (Community Against Sexual Exploitation of Youth. Canada)
OTHER RELATED ORGANIZATIONS, GROUPS, WEBSITES & CAUSES:
*Parents Television Council *Web Wise Kids *InternetSafety.com
*ClearInternational *Cyber Safety Book (Ken Knapton) *Optenet PC
AntiPornography.org supports the CP80 Internet Pornography Solution that provides an option for Internet users to protect children and others from unwanted exposure to pornography. (For those who choose it only.) Please click on the button below to find out more information or to learn how you can support CP80 also.
PORNOGRAPHY ADDICTION AND COMPULSION HELP AND SUPPORT:
*PornAddictionHelp YouTube Channel - AntiPornography.org pjt w. MANY videos & resources!
*Inner Gold *Fight the New Drug *Through the Flame *Compulsions Solutions
*Porn Game Over MeadowCrest Dr. Drew Pinsky HealthySex.com (Wendy Maltz)
Sexual Recovery Institute *Just Be Well *No-Porn.com No-Porn.com Message Board
*Impulse Treatment Center (Sex Addict Treatment - Don L. Matthews) *Covenant Eyes
*Mindful Recovery My Porn Addiction Story - Porn Addiction Help from a Former Addict
Porn Addicts Anonymous Porn & Relationships Q&A (By "Porn Trap's'" Wendy Maltz)
Porn Addict Hubby (Relationship Rescue for Wives & Girlfriends of Internet Porn Addicts)
Don't Reward Bad Behaviour - Guidance for Partners of Porn Addicts
ACCOUNTABILITY SOFTWARE:
Saavi Accountability (www.saaviaccountability.com) -- The only online accountability program that works with all online addictions. It is also the only program that sends notifications instantly via text message to an accountability partner so that they can be supportive when an individual needs it the most at the point of weakness, while they are accessing the online content. The software was created by a young man (26) who overcame his addiction and is trying to help others.
ADDICTION MESSAGE BOARDS & DISCUSSION FORUMS FOR HELP & SUPPORT:
Relationships Damaged By Pornography (iVillage.com) *No-Porn.com Message Board
Porn Addict Hubby Discussion Board (For Wives & Girlfriends of Internet Porn Addicts)
NOTE: There are MANY anti-porn discussion groups at Facebook & MySpace.
Just search GROUPS for "anti-porn," "antiporn," "anti-pornography" & "antipornography"
OTHER HELPFUL FAQs & Q&As: (By other anti-pornography organizations, etc)
*Stop Porn Culture FAQ Porn & Relationships Q&A (By "Porn Trap's'" Wendy Maltz)
One Angry Girl Anti-Porn Resource Center FAQ ("One Angry Girl Answers the FAQs")
*Gail Dines Q&A *Against Pornography FAQ *Shelley Lubben Q&A (Ex-Porn Star)
Prostitution FAQ at Genderberg Fight the New Drug FAQ *No Porn Northampton FAQ
(Note: The No Porn Northampton FAQ is in the bottom half of their sidebar. In addition to the usual questions about pornography it addresses questions and concerns about activism against sexually oriented businesses such as "adult bookstores.")
AntiPornography.org's "Frequently Asked Questions & Responses to Pro-Pornography Arguments"
"The only way to impede sex trafficking is to end demand—to stop buyers from buying."
"DEMAND: A Comparative Examination of Sex Tourism and Trafficking in Jamaica, Japan, the Netherlands, and the United States" - by Shared Hope International
"DEMAND" - A Documentary by Shared Hope International
This excellent documentary by the anti-sex trafficking organization Shared Hope International is about demand factors for sex trafficking, one of the most significant of which is pornography. It also addresses how all forms of commercial sexual exploitation such as pornography, stripping and prostitution are connected to all other forms such as sex trafficking and sex slavery. Please visit EndDemand.org to learn more about how demand for sex trafficking is created by those individuals (mostly men) who purchase women and children for sex.
For 2 minute and 12 minute versions of the above video, as well as more information from Shared Hope about demand, please click here.
Shared Hope International specifically focuses on fighting the demand for commercial sexual exploitaiton, including addressing pornography as a very significant demand factor for sex trafficking.
Please see their excellent report on this issue:
Pornography: Creating Demand for International Sex Trafficking
"Pornography is a marketing device for sex trafficking: It normalizes degradation and violence as acceptable and even inevitable parts of sex, and uses the bodies of real women and children as objects. The difference between pornography and erotica is clear in the roots of the words themselves -- porne means females slaves, eros means love -- so pornography, like rape, is about violence and domination, not sex. Millions of lives depend on our ability to separate pornography from erotica, and to disentangle violence from sexuality."
For information about Gloria Steinem's important work of fighting against the harms of pornography, sex trafficking and other forms of sexual exploitation and abuse, including videos and an audio interview, please see our page on Gloria Steinem. Click here.
For more information on how pornography fuels prostitution and sex trafficking, please see our page on Pornography and Trafficking. Click here. Thank you!
YOUR HELP IS NEEDED. PLEASE DONATE IF YOU ARE ABLE TO.
Please remember that it is not up to AntiPornography.org, the other organizations listed on this page, the government, or "someone else" to do the entire job of fighting against the harms of pornography, prostitution, trafficking, and other forms of sexual exploitation or abuse. It is an enormous job and the responsibility lies with each and every one of us to do our part as part of the bigger team of those who are choosing to be part of the solution of creating a more just and humane world for everyone rather than the problem. So thank you in advance for whatever you are able to contribute to the cause, whether in the form of a tax-deductible donation or your actions. What you do does matter, so for the sake of all those across the world who are being exploited and abused, and for the sake of the future of humanity, please do what you can to create a more compassionate and safer society for all.
Thank you for whatever you are able to give or do to help create a better world for everyone, especially for women, children and future generations.
YOUR SUPPORTIVE ACTIONS AND YOUR DONATIONS ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.
THEY CAN AND WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE!
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